QuotaBillsWine is bottled poetry. - Robert Louis Stevenson
Save water - drink vodka. - Unknown
Payday came and with it beer. - Rudyard Kipling
I work until beer o'clock. - Stephen King
Good wine is a necessity of life. - Thomas Jefferson
Wine and children speak the truth. - Greek Proverb
Candy is dandy but liquor is quicker. - Ogden Nash
Absinthe makes the heart grow fonder. - Addison Mizner
Does wine count as a serving of fruit? - Joe-kster
Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder. - Unknown
You can never buy beer, you just rent it. - Archie Bunker
I like my whiskey old and my women young. - Errol Flynn
Step aside Coffee. This is a job for Alcohol. - Unknown
Wine is the flower in the buttonhole of life. - Werumeus Buning
Draft Dodger: Someone who avoids beer on tap. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Wine is the most civilized thing in the world. - Ernest Hemingway
Beer, it's the best damn drink in the world. - Jack Nicholson
Everything's better with bacon and red wine. - Dianne Harman
Music is the wine that fills the cup of silence. - Robert Fripp
What whiskey will not cure, there is no cure for. - Irish Proverb
As a cure for worrying, work is better than whiskey. - Ralph Waldo Emerson
Bladder: The human apparatus that pays the tax on beer - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
If God forbade drinking, would He have made wine so good? - Cardinal Richelieu
Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy. - Benjamin Franklin
Some call it Cocktail Hour. To me, it's a support group. - Unknown
I'm on a whiskey diet. I've lost three days already. - Tommy Cooper
Give me a woman who loves beer and I will conquer the world. - Wilhelm II
I'm only a beer teetotaller, not a champagne teetotaller. - George Bernard Shaw
A meal of bread, cheese, and beer constitutes the perfect food. - Queen Elizabeth I
We are all mortal until the first kiss and the second glass of wine. - Eduardo Galeano
A bottle of wine contains more philosophy than all the books in the world. - Louis Pasteur
In 1969 I gave up women and alcohol - it was the worst 20 minutes of my life. - George Best
Whiskey is by far the most popular of all remedies that won't cure a cold. - Jerry Vale
One of the disadvantages of wine is that it makes a man mistake words for thoughts. - Samuel Johnson
Logic, like whiskey, loses its beneficial effect when taken in too large quantities. - Lord Dunsany
Kidney: 1. Midpoint of a child's leg; 2. An organ used to convert beer into urine. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys. - P.J. O'Rourke
My heart says chocolate and wine but my jeans say, for the love of God women, eat a salad. - Unknown
Jameson's Irish Whiskey really does improve with age: the older I get the more I like it. - Bob Monkhouse
Just as Jesus created wine from water, we humans are capable of transmuting emotion into music. - Carlos Santana
They don't make pizza or beer out of celery. And that is all you need to know about celery. - Bill Murray
Great people talk about ideas, average people talk about things, and small people talk about wine. - Fran Lebowitz
I'm making wine at home, but I'm making it out of raisins so it will be aged automatically. - Steven Wright
Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day. - George Carlin
A fruit is a vegetable with looks and money. Plus, if you let fruit rot, it turns into wine; something Brussels Sprouts never do. - P.J. O'Rourke
Mancation: A man's vacation. Generally includes lots of beer, a Redneck grill, slabs of meat for cooking and a sack of fireworks. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
A woman should never be seen eating or drinking, unless it be lobster salad and Champagne, the only true feminine and becoming viands. - George G. Byron
A computer lets you make more mistakes faster than any invention in human history - with the possible exceptions of handguns and tequila. - Mitch Ratcliffe
Alcohol is not in my vodkabulary. However, I looked it up on whiskeypedia and learned if you drink too much of it, it's likely tequilya. - Unknown
The simple act of opening a bottle of wine has brought more happiness to the human race than all the collective governments in the history of earth. - Jim Harrison