#1 humor site on the 'net

Where Astronauts Hang Out

What computer keyboards and astronauts have in common

Where Astronauts Hang Out thanks to Howard Chapman

The Space Bar, where a Star Wars character takes a space break

QuotaBills
Good wine needs no vine. - French Proverb

Beer speaks. People mumble. - Tony McGee

Good wine is a necessity of life. - Thomas Jefferson

Adventure is the champagne of life. - G K Chesterton

Canada and space are a natural fit. - Marc Garneau

Language is a virus from outer space. - William S Burroughs

Does wine count as a serving of fruit? - Joe-kster

For NASA, space is still a high priority. - Dan Quayle

Life is too short to drink the house wine. - Helen Thomas

Beer. Now there's a temporary solution. - Homer Simpson

Wine improves with age. I improve with wine. - Unknown

Draft Dodger: Someone who avoids beer on tap. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Wine is the most civilized thing in the world. - Ernest Hemingway

What whiskey will not cure, there is no cure for. - Irish Proverb

I only have two passions: space exploration and hip hop. - Buzz Aldrin

Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy. - Benjamin Franklin

Herb is the healing of a nation, alcohol is the destruction. - Bob Marley

I'm only a beer teetotaller, not a champagne teetotaller. - George Bernard Shaw

My husband said he needed more space. So I locked him outside. - Roseanne Barr

God invented whiskey to prevent the Irish from ruling the world. - Irish Saying

Memorial services are the cocktail parties of the geriatric set. - Ralph Richardson

Ah, good ol' trustworthy beer. My love for you will never die. - Homer Simpson

I was so drunk, I thought a tube of toothpaste was astronaut food. - Will Ferell

We are all mortal until the first kiss and the second glass of wine. - Eduardo Galeano

Men are like wine. Some turn to vinegar, but the best improve with age. - Pope John XXIII

To alcohol! The cause of - and solution to - all of life's problems. - Homer Simpson

Life's too short to hang out with people who aren't resourceful. - Jeff Bezos

You can lead a horse to water but I'd rather ride it to the liquor store. - Wayne Nowazek

If one glass of wine is good for you, just imagine what a whole bottle could do! - Unknown

If Jesus were living in our culture, he would probably hang out in coffeehouses. - Mark Batterson

One of the disadvantages of wine is that it makes a man mistake words for thoughts. - Samuel Johnson

Logic, like whiskey, loses its beneficial effect when taken in too large quantities. - Lord Dunsany

Keyboard: 1. Place to hang your keys; 2. The standard way to generate computer errors. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

New York champagne - that's a phony label. They don't grow raisins in New York. - Archie Bunker

My heart says chocolate and wine but my jeans say, for the love of God women, eat a salad. - Unknown

I don't drink these days. I am allergic to alcohol and narcotics. I break out in handcuffs. - Robert Downey Jr.

Just as Jesus created wine from water, we humans are capable of transmuting emotion into music. - Carlos Santana

Most whale photos you see show whales in this beautiful blue water - it's almost like space. - Brian Skerry

Cyberspace can't compensate for real space. We benefit from chatting to people face to face. - Jonathan Sacks

Great people talk about ideas, average people talk about things, and small people talk about wine. - Fran Lebowitz

Every form of addiction is bad, no matter whether the narcotic be alcohol or morphine or idealism. - Carl Jung

Age is just a number. It's totally irrelevant unless, of course, you happen to be a bottle of wine. - Joan Collins

I am the astronaut of boxing. Joe Louis and Jack Dempsey were just jet pilots. I'm in a world of my own. - Muhammad Ali

The larger office, the corner space, the extra window are the teddy bears and tricycles of adult office life. - Willard Gaylin

Ninety percent I'll spend on good times, women and Irish Whiskey. The other ten percent I'll probably waste. - Tug McGraw

We have embarked upon the world's largest and longest cocktail party, and every issue imaginable is up for grabs. - Geoffrey Moore

The Bible's full of wine. God ain't got nothing against a little drink to celebrate His Son's birthday with. - Archie Bunker

You pretty much can't get away from bacon or whiskey in the South. Put a doughnut in it and you'd be good to go. - Hillary Scott

You live in the image you have of the world. Every one of us lives in a different world, with different space and different time. - Alejandro Jodorowsky

In those days the best painkiller was ice. It wasn't addictive, and it was particularly effective if you poured some whiskey over it. - George Burns


In Step Horse

Finger Olympics

Cow Licks

Dog Distress

Mate Attraction

Dark Room

Lineup For Dinner

Redneck Furnace

Traffic Sign Art

A Dog's Worst Nightmare

Garage Door Art

Kellogg's Fire

Teenage Independence

Parasite Trivia

Bobslide Event

Scooter Races

Bull Squirrel

Wife Consumption

Chinese Shoelusion

Craneception

Pizza Math

Cautious Australia

Homer Escalator, Doh!

Cable Routing in Beirut