#1 humor site on the 'net

U.S. Olympic Team - 2014 Sochi Update

More sad news for Lindsey Vonn

U.S. Olympic Team - 2014 Sochi Update thanks to Jim Serritella

Less than a year ago, Olympic champion Lindsey Vonn tore the anterior cruciate ligament and medial collateral ligament in her right knee and fractured her tibia during a harrowing ski accident in Schlamding, Austria.

U.S. Olympic Team - 2014 Sochi Update thanks to Jim Serritella

Vonn sprained her MCL during a race last month and was airlifted by helicopter to a hospital in Val d’Isere, France.

U.S. Olympic Team - 2014 Sochi Update thanks to Jim Serritella

Concerned she wouldn’t be ready for the 2014 Winter Olympics, the U.S. Olympic Committee announced today her spot on the U.S. Olympic Team would be filled by Barack Obama.

U.S. Olympic officials said Obama deserved the spot on the team because no one has ever taken a country downhill faster than he has.
Post Note: On second thought, Joe Biden would be even better...

QuotaBills
Cross-country skiing is great if you live in a small country. - Steven Wright

The Republic of China - back in the Olympic Games for the first time. - David Coleman

In the Moscow Olympics, Lasse Viren came in fifth and ran a champion's race. - David Coleman

He won the bronze medal in the 1976 Olympics, so he's used to being out in front. - David Coleman

It's the Olympics. If you can't get up to swim early in the morning, don't go. - Michael Phelps

If you don't try to win you might as well hold the Olympics in somebody's backyard. - Jesse Owens

I keep fit. Every morning, I do a hundred laps of an Olympic-sized swimming pool - in a small motor launch. - Peter Cook

If you like the outdoors, Colorado is a big adventure playground for adults: it's great for skiing, cycling, climbing, and hiking. - Tyler Hamilton

Passover and Easter are the only Jewish and Christian holidays that move in sync, like the ice skating pairs we saw during the winter Olympics. - Marvin Olasky


Chinese Puzzle Car

Always Give 100% At Work

Ancient Politician

My Toaster Is Broken

Shining Stars

Tunnel Face

The Bugs Are Bad This Year

Dog Spa

Ostrich Imprint

Local Crabs

World's First Hard Hat

Bird Melons

Bag Hang-Up

LippoPotumus

Haircut For Staff Meetings

Wolf Mode

Undertaker Bike

Throwaway Sport Paper

Pacman Skeleton

Vatican City's New Breakfast Special

Flying Cathedral Excuse

Day At The Beach

John The Baptist Souvenirs

Amish Prom Limo