Tearable Puns

A pun is the lowest form of wit. - John Dennis

Coincidences are spiritual puns. - G K Chesterton

I'm a supporter of my free speech. - Howard Stern

I am disappointment in you're grammar. - Unknown

Speech is of time; silence is of eternity. - Thomas Carlyle

Discretion in speech is more than eloquence. - Francis Bacon

Good sayings are like pearls strung together. - Chinese Proverb

Speech is the vestibule to the palace of love. - Jami of Persia

Ratify: To use a spell and turn a person into a rodent - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Man invented language to satisfy his deep need to complain. - Lily Tomlin

We need a president who's fluent in at least one language. - Buck Henry

You're not a star until they can spell your name in Karachi. - Humphrey Bogart

May my last breath be drawn through a pipe and exhaled in a pun. - Charles Lamb

I failed kindergarten because I couldn't spell my last name. - Zach Galifianakis

To a child's ear, 'mother' is magic in any language. - Arlene Benedict

Retire? I can't spell the word. I'd play in a wheelchair. - Keith Richards

Changes in language often reflect the changing values of a culture. - Ravi Zacharias

I don't give a damn for a man that can only spell a word one way. - Mark Twain

England and America are two countries separated by a common language. - George Bernard Shaw

A pun is the lowest form of humor, unless you thought of it yourself. - Doug Larson

Silence is the language of God; it is also the language of the heart. - Sivananda

Dreams say what they mean, but they don't say it in daytime language. - Gail Godwin

It usually takes more than three weeks to prepare a good impromptu speech. - Mark Twain

Symptoms are the body's mother tongue; signs are in a foreign language. - John Brown

I don't care what you say about me. Just be sure to spell my name wrong. - Barbra Streisand

Under all speech that is good for anything there lies a silence that is better. - Thomas Carlyle

A bore is one who has the power of speech but not the capacity for conversation. - Benjamin Desraeli

No one has a finer command of language than the person who keeps his mouth shut. - Sam Rayburn

Actions, looks, words and steps form the alphabet by which you may spell character. - Johann Kasper Lavater

I personally think we developed language because of our deep inner need to complain. - Jane Wagner

My wife has a slight impediment in her speech. Every now and then she stops to breathe. - Jimmy Durante

A kiss is a lovely trick designed by nature to stop speech when words become superfluous. - Ingrid Bergman

Give me a few lines of a man's handwriting; that will be sufficient for me to get him hanged. - Cardinal Richelieu

Violence of language leads to violence of action. Angry men seldom fight if their tongues do not lead the fray. - Charles V Roman

To suppress free speech is a double wrong. It violates the rights of the hearer as well as those of the speaker. - Frederick Douglass

Grammar: 1. Lives with granpar; 2. The difference between Feeling Your Nuts and Feeling You’re Nuts. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Music expresses feeling and thought, without language; it was below and before speech, and it is above and beyond all words. - Robert G Ingersoll

The symbolic language of the crucifixion is the death of the old paradigm; resurrection is a leap into a whole new way of thinking. - Deepak Chopra

"I am" is reportedly the shortest sentence in the English language. Could it be that "I do" is the longest sentence? - George Carlin

Heard about the young deaf boy who used sign language?
One day he told his mother a dirty joke and she washed his hands out with soap. - Red Skelton