Tactical Texas

Gun Control: Using both hands - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Olfactory: Texas petroleum refinery - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Go pump some neurons. Expand your craniums. - Robin Williams

Parts of Texas look like Kansas with a goiter. - Unknown

Deeds, not stones, are the true monuments of the great. - J.L. Motley

Calling a taxi in Texas is like calling a rabbi in Iraq. - Fran Lebowitz

Temptation is a woman's weapon and man's excuse. - H L Mencken

Shooting Star: A famous actor who uses his gun too often - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

In plain Texas talk, it's 'do the right thing'. - Ross Perot

Failures to heroic minds are the stepping stones to success. - Thomas Chandler Haliburton

Deer hunting would be fine sport, if only the deer had guns. - W S Gilbert

I am proud of the fact that I never invented weapons to kill. - Thomas Edison

The perils of duck hunting are great - especially for the duck. - Walter Cronkite

Prose is a museum, where all the old weapons of poetry are kept. - T.E. Hulme

Stand-up comedy is an art form and it dies unless you expand it. - Sam Kinison

Only a biker knows why a dog sticks his head out of a car window. - Unknown

When the hares have all been caught, the hunting dogs are cooked. - Laozi

Stories are the single most powerful weapon in a leader's arsenal. - Howard Gardner

A lawyer with his briefcase can steal more than a hundred men with guns. - Mario Puzo

Your heaviest artillery will be your will to live. Keep that big gun going. - Norman Cousins

You never know when a moment and a few sincere words can have an impact on life. - Zig Ziglar

The evil that men do lives after them; the good is oft interred with their bones. - William Shakespeare

Hunting is not a sport. In a sport, both sides should know they're in the game. - Paul Rodriguez

A gun is not a weapon, it’s a tool, like a hammer or a screwdriver or an alligator. - Homer Simpson

If a man's from Texas, he'll tell you. If he's not, why embarrass him by asking? - John Gunther

Some folks look at me and see a certain swagger, which in Texas is called 'walking.' - George W. Bush

The difference between a gun and a tree is a difference of tempo. The tree explodes every spring. - Ezra Pound

Good thing we've still got politics in Texas - finest form of free entertainment ever invented. - Molly Ivins

The most interesting thing about a postage stamp is the persistence with which it sticks to its job. - Napoleon Hill

I have great, fond memories of Canada. I feel that one day my bones will more than likely end up there. - Aden Young

They have gun control in Cuba. They have universal health care in Cuba. So why do they want to come here? - Paul Harvey

You describe the elephant by its size, but the mosquito by its impact. Even the smallest thing has an impact. - Celia Apeagyei-Collins

I'm all in favor of keeping dangerous weapons out of the hands of fools. Let's start with typewriters. - Frank Lloyd Wright

You see I'm against hunting, in fact I'm a hunt saboteur. I go out the night before and shoot the fox. - Tim Vine

You can take the girl out of Texas but not the Texas out of the girl and ultimately not the girl out of Texas. - Janine Turner

I am getting to an age when I can only enjoy the last sport left. It is called 'hunting for your spectacles.' - Edward Grey

The reason gas prices are so high is because the oil is in Texas and Oklahoma and all the dipsticks are in Washington. - Yakov Smirnoff

The only weapon with which the unconscious patient can immediately retaliate upon the incompetent surgeon is hemorrhage. - William Stewart Halsted

Unless a man has considerable skill and reliance in his weapon, he will not remain cool in the presence of dangerous game close by. - Townsend Whelen

Clay. It's rain, dead leaves, dust, all my dead ancestors. Stones that have been ground into sand. Mud. The whole cycle of life and death. - Martine Vermeulen