#1 humor site on the 'net

Suntan Consultants

Help your skin for a lifetime - Suntan the Hawaiian Way

Suntan Consultants thanks to joe-kster

Sign of long-term good weather in Lahaina, Maui

Suntan Consultants thanks to joe-kster

QuotaBills
Could you patent the sun? - Jonas Salk

Even dirt glitters when the sun is shining upon it. - Goethe

Hawaii is not a state of mind, but a state of grace. - Paul Theroux

Meet the sun every day as if it could cast a ballot. - Henry C Lodge

Following the light of the sun, we left the Old World. - Christopher Columbus

Even the darkest night will end and the sun will rise. - Victor Hugo

The time to repair the roof is when the sun is shining. - John F Kennedy

I'll tell you how the sun rose - a ribbon at a time. - Emily Dickinson

Keep your eyes on the sun and you will not see the shadows. - Australian Aborigine Saying

Keep your face to the sun and you will never see the shadows. - Helen Keller

A false friend and a shadow attend only while the sun shines. - Benjamin Franklin

A consultant is an ordinary man away from home giving advice. - Oscar Wilde

Life is a pure flame, and we live by an invisible sun within us. - Sir Thomas Brown

The magic of Hawaii comes from the stillness, the sea, the stars. - Joanne Harris

He was like a cock who thought the sun had risen to hear him crow. - George Eliot

After the ship has sunk, a consultant knows how it might have been saved. - Newt Hielscher

A consultant is someone who saves his client almost enough to pay his fee. - Arnold Glasgow

A man hath no better thing under the sun than to eat, drink, and be merry. - Ecclesiastes 8:15

I need the starshine of your heavenly eyes,
After the day's great sun. - Charles Hanson Towne

My greatest strength as a consultant is to be ignorant and ask a few questions. - Peter F Drucker

Sun salutations can energize and warm you, even on the darkest, coldest winter day. - Carol Krucoff

We are mirrors whose brightness is wholly derived from the sun that shines upon us. - C S Lewis

A consultant is a man who knows 147 ways to make love, but doesn't know any women. - Unknown

I know it is wet and the sun is not sunny, but we can have lots of good fun that is funny. - Dr. Seuss

Hope is like the sun, which, as we journey toward it, casts the shadow of our burden behind us. - Samuel Smiles

It used to be that when all else failed, a guy went into the army; now he becomes a consultant. - Blackie Sherrod

Some painters transform the sun into a yellow spot, others transform a yellow spot into the sun. - Pablo Picasso

Consultants are people who come down from the hill to shoot the wounded after the battle is over. - Doc Blakeley

The sun always comes up. Spring always comes after winter. The river always reaches the ocean. Always. - Maxime Lagace

If you cry because the sun has gone out of your life, your tears will prevent you from seeing the stars. - Rabindranath Tagore

Honolulu - it's got everything. Sand for the children, sun for the wife, sharks for the wife's mother. - Ken Dodd

A banker is a fellow who lends you his umbrella when the sun is shining and wants it back the minute it begins to rain. - Mark Twain

Aim at the sun, and you may not reach it; but your arrow will fly far higher than if aimed at an object on a level with yourself. - Joel Hawes

I believe in Christianity as I believe that the sun has risen: not only because I see it, but because by it I see everything else. - C S Lewis

I glanced out the window at the signs of spring. The sky was almost blue, the trees were almost budding, the sun was almost bright. - Millard Kaufman

After every storm the sun will smile; for every problem there is a solution, and the soul's indefeasible duty is to be of good cheer. - William R. Alger

I've seen whales calving in the waters off Maui, and I've watched my children being born. But music is the most beautiful thing of all. - Steven Tyler

Got no checkbooks, got no banks,
Still I'd like to express my thanks -
I got the sun in the mornin'
And the moon at night. - Irving Berlin

I'll paddle board, swim in the ocean, roll in the sand, soak up the sun, eat good food, be with friends and family and go fishing with my dad. - Behati Prinsloo

Even after all this time, the sun never says to the earth, "You owe me." Look what happens with a love like that. It lights the whole sky. - Hafez


2021 Hooters Owl and Birds of Prey Calendars

Biden in the Oval Office

Poor Fishing Day

Mustache Breeze

Chain Weave Hairstyle

Jar of Birds

Wheely Unstable

Roman Segway Chariot

Rocky Orders

Snowmobile Races - Get There Early

Pocket Change

Welcome to Texas, USPS

Not Without A Washer

Jogger's Weight Scale

Toilet Snake

Eye Testing In Progress

Parent Signature

Long Bore Gun

Bird Cam

Lost Wormhole

Where Weir'd Frogmen Jump In

Low Ceiling Workout

Dog Diner

Wet T-Shirt Contest Winners