Redneck Wiener Roast

Talk doesn't cook rice. - Chinese Proverb

Char: Common method of cooking over a campfire - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Home cooking. Where many a man thinks his wife is. - Jimmy Durante

I cook with wine; sometimes I even add it to the food. - WC Fields

I don't even butter my bread. I consider that cooking. - Katherine Cebrian

Jello: The only food your husband has ever learned to cook - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Hot Dog: The only animal that feeds the hand that bites it - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I was 32 when I started cooking; up until then, I just ate. - Julia Child

Wiener: The first to cross the line in a Mexican horse race - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I'm a terrible cook, but I make very good lobster salad. - Nancy Carell

Everyone makes fun of the Redneck until the Zombie Apocalypse. - Unknown

In France, cooking is a serious art form and a national sport. - Julia Child

My wife is such a bad cook, in my house we pray after the meal. - Rodney Dangerfield

Cooking certain dishes, like roast pork, reminds me of my mother. - Maya Angelou

Smoke detectors are basically just you-suck-at-cooking detectors. - Julius Sharpe

Music with dinner is an insult both to the cook and the violinist. - G K Chesterton

I'm a bit of a gourmet chef. I love cooking - mostly Thai food. - Will Ferrell

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you didn't cook it! - Gordon Ramsay

Lawsuit: a machine you go into as a pig and come out of as a sausage. - Ambrose Bierce

Cooking Tip: Wrap turkey leftovers in aluminum foil and throw them out. - Nicole Hollander

Govern a great nation as you would cook a small fish. Do not overdo it. - Lao Tzu

You know you're a redneck if your home has wheels and your car doesn't. - Jeff Foxworthy

The only time to eat diet food is while you're waiting for the steak to cook. - Julia Child

The only good thing about him is his cook. The world visits his dinners, not him. - Moliere

A recipe is only a theme, which an intelligent cook can play each time with a variation. - Madame Benoit

If you meet someone who can cook and do housework, don't hesitate a minute - marry him! - Rita Rudner

From an early age I understood that cooking was never going to be a job, it's a passion. - Gordon Ramsay

My wife is such a bad cook, if we leave dental floss in the kitchen the roaches hang themselves. - Rodney Dangerfield

I prefer Hostess fruit pies to pop-up toaster tarts because they don't require as much cooking. - Carrie Snow

Breakfast is my favorite meal. I cook a big one for everyone - bacon and eggs. I own a lot of eggcups. - Emily Mortimer

It was so hot today that Burger King was singing, 'if you want it your way, cook it yourself.' - Johnny Carson

In the words of Harry S. Truman, "If it's too hot in the kitchen, stay away from the cook." - Archie Bunker

You might be a redneck if your wheelbarrow breaks and it takes four relatives to figure out how to fix it. - Jeff Foxworthy

What my mother believed about cooking is that if you worked hard and prospered, someone else would do it for you. - Nora Ephron

The biggest seller is cookbooks and the second is diet books - how not to eat what you've just learned now to cook. - Andy Rooney

Teach a man to fish and you feed him for a lifetime. Unless he doesn't like sushi, then you also have to teach him to cook. - Auren Hoffman

There is one thing more exasperating than a spouse who can cook and won't... and that's a spouse who can't cook and will. - Robert Frost

Mancation: A man's vacation. Generally includes lots of beer, a Redneck grill, slabs of meat for cooking and a sack of fireworks. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Hypothesis: 1. First thing a Redneck teenager says to his father on the phone; 2. Hippo, horse; thesis, placing: putting something on a horse. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I cook croquetas, and I eat jamon. I keep my diet 100% Mediterranean and drink my Rioja. In that sense, I have a piece of Spain in West Hollywood. - Paz Vega