Redneck Hayride

Work to ride and ride to work. - Unknown

The patient always lies on the couch. - Unknown

Last week I forgot how to ride a bicycle. - Steven Wright

There is not one right way to ride a wave. - Jamie O'Brien

The thicker the hay, the easier it is mowed. - Alaric the Goth

A wise traveler never despises his own country. - Carlo Goldoni

Paying alimony is like feeding hay to a dead horse. - Groucho Marx

Travel and change of place impart new vigor to the mind. - Seneca

Bills travel through the mail at twice the speed of checks. - Steven Wright

If the world were a logical place, men would ride sidesaddle. - Rita Mae Brown

If you ride like there's no tomorrow, there won't be. - Unknown

Have fun, be active. Ride a bike instead of driving, for example. - Dan Buettner

I don't own a camera, so I travel with a police sketch artist. - George Carlin

There are no foreign lands. It is the traveler only who is foreign. - Robert Louis Stevenson

Your body is not a temple, it's an amusement park. Enjoy the ride. - Anthony Bourdain

All journeys have secret destinations of which the traveler is unaware. - Martin Buber

In America there are two classes of travel - first class, and with children. - Robert Benchley

You know you're a redneck if your home has wheels and your car doesn't. - Jeff Foxworthy

Airplane travel is nature's way of making you look like your passport photo. - Al Gore

The Holy Father's newest Encyclacle? Like anyone cares what he rides around on. - Archie Bunker

Too often travel, instead of broadening the mind, merely lengthens the conversation. - Elizabeth Drew

Our deeds still travel with us from afar, and what we have been makes us what we are. - George Eliot

I like the map feature on the iPhone that tells me where I am, because I travel a lot. - Gary Shteyngart

I always wanted to ride a dragon myself, so I decided to do this for a year in my imagination. - Cornelia Funke

The months and days are the travelers of eternity. The years that come and go are also voyagers. - Matsuo Basho

People travel to faraway places to watch, in fascination, the kind of people they ignore at home. - Dagobert D. Runes

Tourists don't know where they've been, travelers don't know where they're going. - Paul Theroux

Though we travel the world over to find the beautiful, we must carry it with us or we find it not. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Dictators ride to and fro upon tigers which they dare not dismount. And the tigers are getting hungry. - Winston Churchill

There ain't no surer way to find out whether you like people or hate them than to travel with them. - Mark Twain

No one realizes how beautiful it is to travel until he comes home and rests his head on his old, familiar pillow. - Lin Yutang

Travel is more than the seeing of sights; it is a change that goes on, deep and permanent, in the ideas of living. - Miriam Beard

To read a writer is for me not merely to get an idea of what he says, but to go off with him and travel in his company. - Andre Gide

Oh my. Space travel sounds rather perilous. I can assure you they will never get me on one of those dreadful Star Ships. - C-3PO

Own only what you can always carry with you: know languages, know countries, know people. Let your memory be your travel bag. - Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn

Every street in London has a camera, and if you ever travel up the M4, it feels as if George Orwell should be your chauffeur. - Don McCullin

As a travel writer I've specialized in gritty, fearful destinations, the kind of places that make a reader's hair stick on end. - Tahir Shah

Lots of people want to ride with you in the limo, but what you want is someone who will take the bus with you when the limo breaks down. - Oprah Winfrey

Men may change their climate, but they cannot change their nature. A man that goes out a fool cannot ride or sail himself into common sense. - Joseph Addison

When you travel, remember that a foreign country is not designed to make you comfortable. It is designed to make its own people comfortable. - Clifton Fadiman