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Redneck Bucket List

Maslow's hierarchy of needs is pretty easy for Bubba

Redneck Bucket List thanks to Mike King

QuotaBills
Beer speaks. People mumble. - Tony McGee

Payday came and with it beer. - Rudyard Kipling

I always wake up at the crack of ice. - Joe E Lewis

Religions change; beer and wine remain. - Hervey Allen

Beer. Now there's a temporary solution. - Homer Simpson

Room service - don't send up any more ice. - WC Fields

If I melt dry ice, can I swim without getting wet? - Steven Wright

Without ice cream there would be darkness and chaos. - Don Kardong

Ah, beer, my one weakness. My Achilles heel, if you will. - Homer Simpson

A diamond is the only kind of ice that keeps a girl warm. - Elizabeth Taylor

Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy. - Benjamin Franklin

I'm only a beer teetotaller, not a champagne teetotaller. - George Bernard Shaw

Everyone makes fun of the Redneck until the Zombie Apocalypse. - Unknown

Ice Water? Get some Onions - that'll make your eyes water! - Groucho Marx

I never drank anything stronger than beer before I was twelve. - WC Fields

A meal of bread, cheese, and beer constitutes the perfect food. - Queen Elizabeth I

Ah, good ol' trustworthy beer. My love for you will never die. - Homer Simpson

The last thing I want to do is hurt you but it's still on the list. - Unknown

In wine there is wisdom, in beer there is freedom, in water there is bacteria. - Ben Franklin

You know you're a redneck if your home has wheels and your car doesn't. - Jeff Foxworthy

When it gets hot like this, you know what I do? I keep my undies in the ice box. - Marilyn Monroe

History is merely a list of surprises. It can only prepare us to be surprised yet again. - Kurt Vonnegut

You call this a party? The beer is warm, the women cold and I'm hot under the collar. - Groucho Marx

It's a strange world of language in which skating on thin ice can get you into hot water. - Franklin P. Jones

I like ice hockey. No one is ever going to ask me to write about that as a metaphor for life. - Steven Pinker

They don't make pizza or beer out of celery. And that is all you need to know about celery. - Bill Murray

Growing up, I'd just be at home, playing tennis, spending my allowance on an ice-cream truck. - Venus Williams

You might be a redneck if your favorite hunting dog has a bigger tombstone than your grandfather. - Jeff Foxworthy

In my mind, I've always been an A-list Hollywood superstar. Y'all just didn't know yet. - Will Smith

For a list of all the ways technology has failed to improve the quality of life, please press three. - Alice Kahn

I'm going to the Colonel next. I'm gonna get a big bucket of chicken chests and smashed potatoes. - Archie Bunker

All the plants in my house are dead - I shot them last night. I was teasing them by watering them with ice cubes. - Steven Wright

For all of the fights I have had in my life, both on and off the ice, I have only been in the back of a cop car once. - Tie Domi

Every day I get up and look through the Forbes list of the richest people in America. If I'm not there, I go to work. - Robert Orben

Put 'eat chocolate' at the top of your list of things to do today. That way, at least you'll get one thing done. - Unknown

Mancation: A man's vacation. Generally includes lots of beer, a Redneck grill, slabs of meat for cooking and a sack of fireworks. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

NASA's robot Curiosity landed on Mars. Early pictures show no signs of ESPN or beer. This makes it very clear that men are not from Mars. - Unknown

New Pasta Diet: Just walk pasta bakery without stopping. Walk pasta candy store without stopping. Walk pasta ice cream shop without stopping. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Passover and Easter are the only Jewish and Christian holidays that move in sync, like the ice skating pairs we saw during the winter Olympics. - Marvin Olasky

I contend that for a nation to try to tax itself into prosperity is like a man standing in a bucket and trying to lift himself up by the handle. - Winston Churchill


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