Read The Fine Print

Ancestry is a hereditary condition. - Unknown

The best thing to break is a contract. - WC Fields

Lawyers are guardians of the legal order. - Philip Wood

On Time: An obscure term, meaning unknown - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Military intelligence is a contradiction in terms. - Groucho Marx

When I go I'll take New Year's Eve with me. - Guy Lombardo

Panic is not an effective long-term organizing strategy. - Starhawk

Embarrassed: Emmy's condition after losing her pants - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Millions saw the apple fall, but Newton was the one who asked why. - Bernard Baruch

I think in terms of the day's resolutions, not the year's. - Henry Moore

It is not clear that intelligence has any long-term survival value. - Stephen Hawking

If Adam and Eve were alive today, they would probably sue the snake. - Bern Williams

If it weren't for my adam's apple, I'd have no shape at all. - Phyllis Diller

Civilization is a movement and not a condition, a voyage and not a harbor. - Arnold J. Toynbee

Apple: Nutritious lunchtime dessert which children will trade for cupcakes. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

An economist is a man who states the obvious in terms of the incomprehensible. - Alfred A. Knopf

Adam, the first great benefactor of our race. He brought death into the world. - Mark Twain

Guarantee: A legal vehicle which expires on the same day as your mechanical one - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Statistics show that of those who contract the habit of eating, very few survive. - Wallace Irwin

Being defeated is often a temporary condition. Giving up is what makes it permanent. - Marilyn vos Savant

"Absorption of overhead" is one of the most obscene terms I have ever heard. - Peter F Drucker

Amnesia: The condition that enables a woman who has gone through labour to have sex again. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I didn't like the play, but then I saw it under adverse conditions - the curtain was up. - Groucho Marx

If a man dies and leaves his estate in an uncertain condition, the lawyers become his heirs. - Edgar Watson Howe

Even if I knew that tomorrow the world would go to pieces, I would still plant my apple tree. - Martin Luther

Democracy does not guarantee equality of conditions - it only guarantees equality of opportunity. - Irving Kristol

For a war to be just three conditions are necessary - public authority, just cause, right motive. - Ernest Hemingway

If you wait for perfect conditions to seize an opportunity, you'll be waiting till the day you die. - Mark Batterson

Some habits of ineffectiveness are rooted in our social conditioning toward quick-fix, short-term thinking. - Stephen Covey

The mind of a bigot is like the pupil of the eye. The more light you shine on it, the more it will contract. - Oliver Wendell Homes, Jr.

Mankind likes to think in terms of extreme opposites - between which it recognizes no intermediate possibilities. - John Dewey

If you want to kill an idea without being identified as the assassin, suggest that the legal department take a look at it. - Scott Adams

Thirty was so strange for me. I've really had to come to terms with the fact that I am now a walking and talking adult. - C S Lewis

Spend your time with those who love you unconditionally, not with those who love you only when the condition is right for them. - Unknown

If you think in terms of a year, plant a seed; if in terms of ten years, plant trees; if in terms of 100 years, teach the people. - Confucius

Feeling sorry for yourself, and your present condition, is not only a waste of energy but the worst habit you could possibly have. - Dale Carnegie

One has not only a legal, but a moral responsibility to obey just laws. Conversely, one has a moral responsibility to disobey unjust laws. - Martin Luther King, Jr

No theory is good unless it permits, not rest, but the greatest work. No theory is good except on condition that one use it to go on beyond. - Andre Gide

Sometimes a miracle is a change in material conditions, such as physical healing. At other times, it is a psychological or emotional change. - Marianne Williamson

We hear voices in solitude, we never hear in the hurry and turmoil of life; we receive counsels and comforts we get under no other condition. - Amelia Barr