Protractor Cook

Talk doesn't cook rice. - Chinese Proverb

Bake the world a better place. - Unknown

Baking is science for hungry people. - Unknown

She did not so much cook as assassinate food. - Storm Jameson

Home cooking. Where many a man thinks his wife is. - Jimmy Durante

Algebra: Undergarment worn by female math teachers - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I cook with wine; sometimes I even add it to the food. - WC Fields

Poultry is for the cook what canvas is for the painter. - Jean Anthelme Brillat-Savarin

I am an expert in Higher Level Math: You + God = Enough - Zig Ziglar

I don't even butter my bread. I consider that cooking. - Katherine Cebrian

Dear Math: I'm not a therapist. Solve your own problems. - Unknown

My wife's such a bad cook, the dog begs for Alka-Seltzer. - Rodney Dangerfield

Math is like love - a simple idea but it can get complicated. - R. Drabek

Music with dinner is an insult both to the cook and the violinist. - G K Chesterton

I'm a bit of a gourmet chef. I love cooking - mostly Thai food. - Will Ferrell

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you didn't cook it! - Gordon Ramsay

The right angle for approaching a problem, is the 'try'angle. - Joe-kster

Arbitrator: A cook that leaves Arby's to work for McDonald's. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I put instant coffee in a microwave oven and almost went back in time. - Steven Wright

Best wide-angle lens? Two steps backward. Look for the 'ah-ha.' - Ernst Haas

If ever a chef were to cook a fly, he would keep the breast for himself. - Poland Proverb

Happiness is largely an attitude of mind, of viewing life from the right angle. - Dale Carnegie

The only time to eat diet food is while you're waiting for the steak to cook. - Julia Child

My cooking is so bad my kids thought Thanksgiving was to commemorate Pearl Harbor. - Phyllis Diller

I like to crack the jokes now and again, but it's only because I struggle with math. - Tina Fey

Polly had a gift for baking pies, and she poured her heart and soul into every one she made. - Sarah Weeks

A bad review is like baking a cake with all the best ingredients and having someone sit on it. - Danielle Steel

There are 3 kinds of people in this world: those who are good at math, and those who aren't. - Unknown

It was so hot today that Burger King was singing, 'if you want it your way, cook it yourself.' - Johnny Carson

In the words of Harry S. Truman, "If it's too hot in the kitchen, stay away from the cook." - Archie Bunker

The wonderful world of home appliances now makes it possible to cook indoors with charcoal and outdoors with gas. - Bill Vaughan

You can go your whole life and not need math or physics for a minute, but the ability to tell a joke is always handy. - Garrison Keillor

No matter what the recipe, any baker can do wonders in the kitchen with some good ingredients and an upbeat attitude. - Buddy Valastro

The two things that are going to make you a better baker without even trying are a scale and a thermometer in your oven. - Tom Douglas

An expert is like the bottom of a double boiler. It shoots off a lot of steam, but it never really knows what's cooking. - Unknown

At the age of six I wanted to be a cook. At seven I wanted to be Napoleon. And my ambition has been growing steadily ever since. - Salvador Dali

I read recipes the same way I read science fiction. I get to the end and I think, "Well, that's not going to happen." - Unknown

I love cookies baking. During the winter, they have these candles that smell like cookies, and I always buy like a hundred of them. - Jared Padalecki

Mancation: A man's vacation. Generally includes lots of beer, a Redneck grill, slabs of meat for cooking and a sack of fireworks. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I cook croquetas, and I eat jamon. I keep my diet 100% Mediterranean and drink my Rioja. In that sense, I have a piece of Spain in West Hollywood. - Paz Vega