One Way Repairs

Fjord: Norwegian car - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Khaki: A thing for starting a car - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Safety doesn't happen by accident. - Unknown

Name the greatest of all inventors. Accident. - Mark Twain

Didn't he take the exercise tax off cars? - Archie Bunker

Never invest emergency savings in the stock market. - Suze Orman

Substance is not enough, accident is also required. - Greek Proverb

Stardom isn't a profession, it's an accident. - Lauren Bacall

Feminism is a wonderful idea until the car goes wrong. - Nicola Zweig

Auto racing began 5 minutes after the second car was built. - Henry Ford

Giving never happens by accident. It's always intentional. - Amy Grant

You should never have more children than you have car windows. - Erma Bombeck

Nervous Wreck: What lies at the bottom of the ocean and twitches - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The best car safety device is a rear-view mirror with a cop in it. - Dudley Moore

To attract men, I wear a perfume called "New Car Interior". - Rita Rudner

One way to get the most out of life is to look upon it as an adventure. - William Feather

When a police officer tells you to stay in the car, you stay in the car. - Reese Witherspoon

Stress is an ignorant state. It believes that everything is an emergency. - Natalie Goldberg

A private railroad car is not an acquired taste. One takes to it immediately. - Eleanor R. Belmont

There is nothing so strong or safe in an emergency of life as the simple truth. - Charles Dickens

I spent a lot of my money on booze, birds and fast cars... the rest I squandered. - George Best

Drive-in banks were established so most of the cars today could see their real owners. - E. Joseph Crossman

There's no one way to dance. And that's kind of my philosophy about everything. - Ellen Degeneres

Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys. - P.J. O'Rourke

If you're not paying for it through the health plan, you pay for it in the emergency room. - David Lehman

My mechanic told me, "I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder." - Steven Wright

HonkoSecond: The time between the light turning green and the sound from the car horn behind you - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The lead car is absolutely, truly unique, except for the one behind it which is exactly identical. - Murray Walker

Marriage has no guarantees. If that's what you're looking for, go live with a car battery. - Erma Bombeck

One of the tests of leadership is the ability to recognize a problem before it becomes an emergency. - Arnold H. Glasow

I replaced the headlights in my car with strobe lights, so it looks like I'm the only one moving. - Steven Wright

One way to sell a consumer something in the future is simply to get his or her permission in advance. - Seth Godin

I'm going to the backseat of my car with the woman I love, and I won't be back for ten minutes. - Homer Simpson

I don't think I'm a celebrity. I'm just a guy from east Texas who loves cars and airplanes. - Carroll Shelby

When walking, you see things that you miss in a motor car or on the train. You give your mind space to ponder. - Tom Hodgkinson

The average auto owner drives so blamed reckless I'm glad that he does git robbed when he pays a repair bill. - Kin Hubbard

Poverty: 1. A state of mind sometimes induced by a neighbour's new car; 2. One thing that money can't buy. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

It's a sad day when you find out that it's not accident or fortune but just yourself that kept things from you. - Lillian Hellman

Business meetings are important because they're one way of demonstrating how many people the company can operate without. - Unknown

It is amazing how quickly the kids learn to drive a car, yet are unable to understand the lawn mower, snowblower and vacuum cleaner. - Ben Bergor