Nose Hair? She needs a Barb-hair

Never ask the barber if you need a haircut. - Warren Buffet

Even the worst haircut eventually grows out. - Lisa Kogan

A hair on the head is worth two on the brush. - Oliver Herford

Lead the audience by the nose to the thought. - Laurence Olivier

You're only as good as your last haircut. - Fran Lebowitz

He doesn't dye his hair, he bleaches his face. - Johnny Carson

There is nothing so difficult to marry as a large nose. - Oscar Wilde

Let the wind blow through your hair while you still have some. - Dave Weinbaum

I have so much hair, I have a separate wig closet in my house. - Sherri Shepherd

I am thankful for laughter, except when milk comes out my nose. - Woody Allen

I don't consider myself bald. I'm simply taller than my hair. - Tom Sharp

I have little hair because my brain is so big it pushes the hair out. - Silvio Berlusconi

Leaders inspire. They aren't assigned leadership. They command it. - Dr. Phil McGraw

The right to swing my fist ends where the other man's nose begins. - Oliver Wendell Holmes

If truth is beauty, how come no one has their hair done in the library? - Lily Tomlin

If I want to knock a story off the front page, I just change my hairstyle. - Hillary Clinton

Sometimes it's the people you can't help who inspire you the most. - Melinda Gates

Actually, I comb my hair quite often. Of course, I use an electric toothbrush. - Phyllis Diller

Always hold your head up, but be careful to keep your nose at a friendly level. - Max L. Forman

Use your imagination not to scare yourself to death but to inspire yourself to life. - Adele Brookman

As a child, I always chose a false nose and some face paint and a wig for my birthday. - Ashley Jensen

A celebrity is anyone who looks like he spends more than two hours working on his hair. - Steve Martin

I'm not Irish. Just because I have red hair doesn't mean I'm a lucky charm. - Rebecca Mader

A man never reaches that dizzy height of wisdom when he can no longer be led by the nose. - Mark Twain

It is difficult to inspire others to accomplish what you haven't been willing to try. - Unknown

I get more distracted by hair or a really bad wig than I do costumes any day of the week. - Colleen Atwood

For three days after death hair and fingernails continue to grow but phone calls taper off. - Johnny Carson

Whether you're a man or not comes from your heart, not how much hair you have on your head. - Bruce Willis

I slipped at a bus stop; I went one way and my hair went the other. That was the end of my wig. - Tia Carrere

Do I have a large frog in my hair? I'm worried about the sensation of my brain being eaten. - Joaquin Phoenix

Too bad all the people who know how to run this country are busy running taxicabs or cutting hair. - George Burns

Let hope inspire you, but let not idealism blind you. Don't look back, you can never look back. - Don Henley

Forget not that the earth delights to feel your bare feet and the winds long to play with your hair. - Khalil Gibran

I benefit from the Mr. Potato Head syndrome. Put a wig and a nose and glasses on me, and I disappear. - Phil Hartman

Her capacity for family affection is extraordinary: when her third husband died, her hair turned quite gold from grief. - Oscar Wilde

Laundry's easier when you live alone. Fifteen minutes before a date, put 'em on, dry 'em with a hair blower. - Elayne Boosler

Inflation is when you pay fifteen dollars for the ten dollar haircut you used to get for five dollars when you had hair. - Sam Ewing

As a travel writer I've specialized in gritty, fearful destinations, the kind of places that make a reader's hair stick on end. - Tahir Shah

Beauty isn't worth thinking about; what's important is your mind. You don't want a fifty-dollar haircut on a fifty-cent head. - Garrison Keillor

His mind is concrete and fastidious,
His nose is remarkably big;
His visage is more or less hideous,
His beard it resembles a wig. - Edward Lear