QuotaBillsSanta's Guh-nomes - Archie Bunker
Every man under his own fig tree. - Hebrew Saying
The apple will fall under the apple tree. - Greek Proverb
A turkey never voted for an early Christmas. - Unknown
The righteous will flourish like the palm tree. - Psalms 92:12
I get really grinchy right up until Christmas morning. - Dan Aykroyd
By trying often, the monkey learns to jump from the tree. - Cameroon Proverb
Life without love is like a tree without blossoms or fruit. - Kahlil Gibran
Modesty is not only an ornament, but also a guard to virtue. - Joseph Addison
Native ability without education is like a tree without fruit. - Aristippus
Character is the root of the tree; conduct, the fruit it bears. - E.M. Bounds
I ordered a bed from IKEA and they sent me a tree trunk and a saw. - Eileen Curtright
Zealotry: 1. The enemy of idealism; 2. What a tree salesman likes to do. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
The best time to plant a tree was 20 years ago. The second best time is now. - Chinese Proverb
Nothing's as mean as giving a little child something useful for Christmas. - Kin Hubbard
Learn not to talk to me. You shake the tree, a leopard's going to fall out. - Kobe Bryant
Mail your packages early, so the Post Office can lose them in time for Christmas. - Johnny Carson
The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live. - George Carlin
Aren't we forgetting the true meaning of Christmas? You know, the birth of Santa. - Bart Simpson
Chocolate comes from coco, which is a tree - that makes it a plant. Chocolate is salad. - Unknown
True and solemn meaning of Christmas, which is a time for peace and quiet contemptation. - Archie Bunker
Someone's sitting in the shade today because someone planted a tree a long time ago. - Warren Buffett
Learning is an ornament in prosperity, a refuge in adversity, and a provision in old age. - Aristotle
The tree of liberty must be refreshed from time to time with the blood of patriots and tyrants. - Thomas Jefferson
The Bermuda Triangle got tired of warm weather. It moved to Alaska. Now Santa Claus is missing. - Steven Wright
The difference between a gun and a tree is a difference of tempo. The tree explodes every spring. - Ezra Pound
I still have my Christmas Tree. I looked at it today. Sure enough, I couldn't see any forests. - Steven Wright
Why pay money to have your family tree traced; go into politics and your opponents will do it for you. - Unknown
The best of all gifts around any Christmas tree: the presence of a family all wrapped up in each other. - Bill Vaughan
The reason there are so many tree-lined boulevards in Paris is so the German army can march in the shade. - George S Patton
I gave my young nephew a book for Christmas. He's spent six months looking for where to put
the batteries. - Milton Berle
Except during the nine months before he draws his first breath, no man manages his affairs as well as a tree does. - George Bernard Shaw
A lovely thing about Christmas is that it's compulsory, like a thunderstorm, and we all go through it together. - Garrison Keillor
He that climbs the tall tree has won the right to the fruit; he that leaps the wide gulf should prevail in his suit. - Walter Scott
It's in the democratic citizen's nature to be like a leaf that doesn't believe in the tree it's part of. - David Foster Wallace
Did you read about Starbucks? No more "Merry Christmas" at Starbucks. No more. Maybe we should boycott Starbucks. - Donald Trump
Only when the last tree has withered, and the last fish caught, and the last river been poisoned, will we realize we cannot eat money. - Cree Proverb
Some national parks have long waiting lists for camping reservations. When you have to wait a year to sleep next to a tree, something is wrong. - George Carlin
Wise sayings are not only for ornament, but for action and business, having a point or edge, whereby knots in business are pierced and discovered. - Francis Bacon
Love is like the wild-rose briar, friendship like the holly-tree. The holly is dark when the rose-briar blooms, but which will bloom most constantly? - Emily Bronte