Months Apart

Titillate: A tardy meal for a breast-fed baby - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I hope karma slaps you in the face before I do. - Unknown

My dad's my best mate, and he always will be. - Cher Lloyd

Goat Herder: A person who likes to work with kids - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Yet despite the look on my face, you are still talking. - Unknown

A father is the one friend upon whom we can always rely. - Emile Gaboriau

When I was a kid I inhaled frequently. That was the point. - Barack Obama

He had a dashing smile. It nearly dashed right off his face. - Shannon Hale

Baby I paint the sky blue
My greatest creation was you. - Jay-Z

Let's face it, all the good stuff happens after midnight. - Matt Groening

On Halloween, the parents sent their kids out looking like me. - Rodney Dangerfield

If pregnancy were a book, they would cut the last two chapters. - Nora Ephron

I phoned my Dad to tell him I had stopped smoking. He called me a quitter. - Steven Pearl

Necessity may be the mother of invention, but play is certainly the father. - Roger von Oech

Nothing encourages creativity like the chance to fall flat on one's face. - James D Finley

I'm pretty intentional about being highly invested in my kids' lives. - Mark Batterson

You use a glass mirror to see your face; you use works of art to see your soul. - George Bernard Shaw

Humour is based on a modicum of truth. Ever heard a joe-k about a father-in-law? - Dick Clark

Any idiot can face a crisis - it's the day-to-day living that wears you out. - Anton Chekhov

When I was a kid, I used to think pork chops and karate chops were the same thing. - Shane Koyczan

Aren't we forgetting the true meaning of Christmas? You know, the birth of Santa. - Bart Simpson

No man I ever met was my father's equal, and I never loved any other man as much. - Hedy Lamarr

Facts, opinions, and value statements push people apart, stories bring people together. - Chuck Matthei

My brother Bob doesn't want to be in government - he promised Dad he'd go straight. - John F Kennedy

Becoming a dad means you have to be a role model for your son and be someone he can look up to. - Wayne Rooney

Lately all my friends are worried they're turning into their fathers. I'm worried I'm not. - Dan Zevin

No matter how long we've been together Edith, you still, as the kids say, "turn me over." - Archie Bunker

When I invite a woman to dinner I expect her to look at my face.
That's the price she has to pay. - Groucho Marx

A father is always making his baby into a little woman. And when she is a woman he turns her back again. - Enid Bagnold

This country has come to feel the same when Congress is in session as when the baby gets hold of a hammer. - Will Rogers

Individuals need to be willing to face truth about their attitudes, behaviors, even what we want out of life. - Joyce Meyer

I think that most people would rather face the light of a real enemy than the darkness of their imagined fears. - Max Brooks

I want my kids to have the things in life that I never had when I was growing up. Things like beards and chest hair. - Jarod Kintz

Menopause: because nature decided that pregnancy, labor, delivery, breastfeeding, and stretch marks wasn't enough. - Unknown

To be a successful father... there's one absolute rule: when you have a kid, don't look at it for the first two years. - Ernest Hemingway

After marriage, husband and wife become two sides of a coin; they just can't face each other, but still they stay together. - Sacha Guitry

I find that it is not the circumstances in which we are placed, but the spirit in which we face them, that constitutes our comfort. - Elizabeth T. King

Juvenile Delinquent: 1. A youngster who has been given a free hand but not in the proper place; 2. A kid who starts acting like his parents. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

When I get through tearing a lobster apart, or one of those tender West Coast octopuses, I feel like I had a drink from the fountain of youth. - Joseph Mitchell

Today is yesterday's victory, yesterday is tomorrow's conquest, and tomorrow is today's war. Though I face death, I am not fearsome. - Nadège Richards