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Mom's Kid

Happy Mother's Day from her only child

Mom's Kid thanks to Wayne Nowazek

Weird kids are even more special on Mother's Day

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Mother is a verb, not a noun. - Shonda Rhimes

Silence is the mother of truth. - Benjamin Disraeli

Grammer: Your father's mother. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Leisure is the Mother of Philosophy. - Thomas Hobbes

Diligence is the mother of good fortune. - Benjamin Disraeli

Fearlessness is the mother of reinvention. - Arianna Huffington

Getting caught is the mother of invention. - Robert Byrne

Inner silence is the mother of all talents. - Ravi Shankar

An ounce of mother is worth a tone of priest. - Spanish Proverb

Necessity, who is the mother of our invention. - Plato

My mother told me a million times not to exaggerate. - Unknown

You're not famous until my mother has heard of you. - Jay Leno

Jesus was a Jew, yes, but only on his mother's side. - Archie Bunker

Being a mother is an attitude, not a biological relation. - Robert A. Heinlein

Modern Mother: One who worries if her daughter gets in too early - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

To a child's ear, 'mother' is magic in any language. - Arlene Benedict

Sweater: A garment worn by a child when his mother feels chilly. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Adam was the luckiest man in the world - he had no mother-in-law. - Sholom Aleichem

If a deaf person swears, does his mother wash his hands with soap? - George Carlin

Mother is a verb. It's something you do. Not just who you are. - Dorothy C Fisher

I know enough to know that when you're in a pickle... call Mom. - Jennifer Garner

A grandmother pretends she doesn't know who you are on Halloween. - Erma Bombeck

We laugh, we cry, we make time fly. We are best friends, my mom and I. - Unknown

Mother - that was the bank where we deposited all our hurts and worries. - T Dewitt Talmage

My mother had a great deal of trouble with me, but I think she enjoyed it. - Mark Twain

I'd like to be the ideal mother, but I'm too busy raising my kids. - Unknown

Summer Camps: Those places where little boys go for mother's vacation. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Necessity may be the mother of invention, but play is certainly the father. - Roger von Oech

My mother hated me. Once she took me to an orphanage and told me to mingle. - Phyllis Diller

The only thing a lawyer won't question is the legitimacy of his mother. - WC Fields

There never was a child so lovely but his mother was glad to get him asleep. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

The most important thing a father can do for his children is to love their mother. - Henry Ward Beecher

If you can't be in awe of Mother Nature, there's something wrong with you. - Alex Trebek

My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well. I was amazed - I never knew they worked. - Les Dawson

My mother is no spring chicken although she has got as many chemicals in her as one. - Edna Everage

You know you're a mom when you understand why mama bear's porridge was cold. - Jody Defries

I not only think we tamper with Mother Nature, I think that Mother Nature wants us to. - Willard Gatlin

Mother is the heartbeat in the home; and without her, there seems to be no heart throb. - Leroy Brownlow

The Iron Curtain may be a thing of the past, but Mother Russia is as mysterious as ever. - Robert Gottlieb

I just wasn't cut out to be a Chinese Tiger Mom. I'm more of an Irish Setter Dad. - P.J. O'Rourke

A grandmother is a little bit parent, a little bit teacher, and a little bit best friend. - Unknown

A conservative is someone who makes no changes and consults his grandmother when in doubt. - Woodrow Wilson

My perspective on my mother has changed immensely. She was a lot taller when I was younger. - Howie Mandel

You don't have to deserve your mother's love. You have to deserve your father's. - Robert Frost

Once you're a mom, you're always a mom. It's like riding a bike, you never forget. - Taraji P Henson

Said the daughter: "I don't have to help my Mom with the housework. She knows how." - Unknown

By the time a woman realizes her mother was right, she has a daughter who thinks she's wrong. - Unknown

It is not until you become a mother that your judgment slowly turns to compassion and understanding. - Erma Bombeck

My grandmother was a very tough woman. She buried three husbands, and two of them were just napping. - Rita Rudner

Sayin' grace - it's just thankin' Mother Nature, whose 1st name just happens to be Grace. - Archie Bunker

Youth fades; love droops; the leaves of friendship fall. A mother's secret hope outlives them all. - Oliver Wendell Holmes

The older I grow, the more I realize that my mother is the best 'best friend' that I ever had. - Unknown

I was such an ugly baby. My mother never breast fed me. She told me that she only liked me as a friend. - Rodney Dangerfield

I wanted to do something nice so I bought my mother-in-law a chair. Now they won't let me plug it in. - Henny Youngman

Food: The response Mom usually gives in answer to the question, "What's for dinner tonight?" - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

My mother always used to say, "The older you get, the better you get. Unless you're a banana." - Betty White

My mother always told me I wouldn't amount to anything because I procrastinate. I said, Just wait. - Judy Tenuta

Drunk Man: "I can't bear fools."
Dorothy Parker: "Apparently your mother could." - Dorothy Parker

Honolulu - it's got everything. Sand for the children, sun for the wife, sharks for the wife's mother. - Ken Dodd

What greater aspiration and challenge are there for a mother than the hope of raising a great son or daughter? - Rose Kennedy

There has never been, nor will there ever be, anything quite so special as the love between a mother and a son. - Unknown

I love those hockey moms. You know what they say the difference between a hockey mom and a pit bull is? Lipstick. - Sarah Palin

I am one of those cliff-hanging Catholics. I don't believe in God, but I do believe that Mary was his mother. - Martin Sheen

Hope is the companion of power, and mother of success; for who so hopes strongly has within him the gift of miracles. - Samuel Smiles

As a family we couldn't decide whether to have Grandma buried or cremated, so in the end we decided to let her live. - Gary Delaney

My Mother: She is beautiful, softened at the edges and tempered with a spine of steel. I want to grow old and be like her. - Jodi Picoult

I stopped believing in Santa Claus when I was six. Mother took me to see him in a department store and he asked for my autograph. - Shirley Temple

Worrying is less work than doing something to fix the worry. Everybody wants to save the earth; nobody wants to help Mom with the dishes. - P.J. O'Rourke

Love as powerful as your mother's for you leaves its own mark ... to have been loved so deeply ... will give us some protection forever. - J K Rowling

How shall a man escape from his ancestors, or draw off from his veins the black drop which he drew from his father’s or mother's life? - Ralph Waldo Emerson


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