#1 humor site on the 'net

Low Budget Tree

Looking for an unnatural Christmas tree?

Low Budget Tree thanks to Idske Mulder, The Netherlands

Bubba's bootiful Christmas tree

QuotaBills
The expensive is cheap. - Arabic Saying

Trust is central to an economy that works. - Stephen Covey

A turkey never voted for an early Christmas. - Unknown

Once there was a tree, and she loved a little boy. - Shel Silverstein

I thought talk was cheap until I saw our telephone bill. - Henny Youngman

By trying often, the monkey learns to jump from the tree. - Cameroon Proverb

Life without love is like a tree without blossoms or fruit. - Kahlil Gibran

You'd be surprised how much it costs to look this cheap. - Dolly Parton

Native ability without education is like a tree without fruit. - Aristippus

False Economy: using only 30 candles on her 40th birthday cake - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

When you think about a walking tree, laughter is the response. - John Rhys-Davies

If a tree falls in the forest and no one hears, does it make a sound? - Unknown

Family Tree: The only tree whose branches seek the shelter of its roots - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Real happiness is cheap enough, yet how dearly we pay for its counterfeit. - Hosea Ballou

Mexico: where life is cheap, death is rich, and the buzzards are never unhappy. - Edward Abbey

I don't have to look up my family tree, because I know that I'm the sap. - Fred Allen

Mail your packages early, so the Post Office can lose them in time for Christmas. - Johnny Carson

Each has his own tree of ancestors, but at the top of all sits Probably Arboreal. - Robert Louis Stevenson

Someone told me I was immature. Guess who's not allowed in my tree house now? - Unknown

Aren't we forgetting the true meaning of Christmas? You know, the birth of Santa. - Bart Simpson

True and solemn meaning of Christmas, which is a time for peace and quiet contemptation. - Archie Bunker

At the heart of the Irish economy has always been the philosophy of tax competitiveness. - Bono

If 'ifs and buts' were 'candy and nuts', we'd have Christmas every day. - Unknown

Make pumpkin bread as the default gift for everyone. It is cheap, it is beloved, it is carbs. - Karen Bender

Gorilla tourism is vital to Rwanda's economy: It's the third highest source of income. - Andy Serkis

I've been asked to say a couple of words about my husband, Fang. How about short and cheap? - Phyllis Diller

I still have my Christmas Tree. I looked at it today. Sure enough, I couldn't see any forests. - Steven Wright

It's better to fall from a tree and break your back than to fall in love and break your heart. - African Proverb

The Christmas season has come to mean the period when the public plays Santa Claus to the merchants. - John Andrew Holmes

There's no point in wasting calories on cheap chocolate, always opt for the darkest and richest. - Nanci Rathbun

The reason there are so many tree-lined boulevards in Paris is so the German army can march in the shade. - George S Patton

There is not Communism or Marxism, but representative democracy and social justice in a well-planned economy. - Fidel Castro

I gave my young nephew a book for Christmas. He's spent six months looking for where to put the batteries. - Milton Berle

A lovely thing about Christmas is that it's compulsory, like a thunderstorm, and we all go through it together. - Garrison Keillor

He that climbs the tall tree has won the right to the fruit; he that leaps the wide gulf should prevail in his suit. - Walter Scott

It's in the democratic citizen's nature to be like a leaf that doesn't believe in the tree it's part of. - David Foster Wallace

Forgiveness is the economy of the heart. Forgiveness saves the expense of anger, the cost of hatred, the waste of spirits. - Hannah More

I stopped believing in Santa Claus when I was six. Mother took me to see him in a department store and he asked for my autograph. - Shirley Temple

Wolves directly affect the entire ecosystem, not just moose populations, their main prey, because less moose equals more tree growth. - Rolf Peterson

Wise sayings are not only for ornament, but for action and business, having a point or edge, whereby knots in business are pierced and discovered. - Francis Bacon


Dead Batteries

Cheers!

Roger That

What Day Is It?

Blinker Fluid

Temple Car

Family Birthday Reminder

Coffee Days

New Audi

Netherlands Parking Lot

Wine Bibber

Tylenol Ban

Politician Plane

Seaweed Burger

Louisiana Potholes

Marathon Runner Tip

Spit Priorities

How To Argue With A Woman

Montreal Protest

Suitcase Staycation

Math Lab Bust

Life And Beer Are Very Similar

Girlfriend Math

Shopping With Your Husband