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Hollywood is like Picasso's bathroom. - Candice Bergen

Always go to the bathroom when you have a chance. - King George V

Igloo: 1. An icicle built for two; 2. An Alaskan toilet. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I would rather sleep in a bathroom than in another hotel. - Billy Wilder

I never feel so much myself as when I'm in a hot bath. - Sylvia Plath

Endangered forests are being slaughtered for toilet paper. - Daphne Zuniga

The kitchen. The bathroom. The yin and yang of the household. - David C. Holley

There's a lot involved in going to the bathroom for women. - Leah Remini

Every bathroom in my house will ultimately have a Toto bidet in it. - Ken Marino

My grandmother took a bath every year, whether she was dirty or not. - Brendan Behan

Most of the time he sounds like he has a mouth full of toilet paper. - Rex Reed

Running is an unnatural act, except from enemies and to the bathroom. - Unknown

It never fails - you get in the bath and there's a rub at the lamp. - Robin Williams

I could tell my parents hated me. My bath toys were a toaster and radio. - Rodney Dangerfield

My honeymoon night was spent on the floor in the bathroom with my mother. - Ronnie Spector

I started singing in the bathroom. Nothing was coming out. It was ghastly. - Rod Stewart

High school is a lot like toilet paper: you only miss it when it's gone. - Unknown

I threw the kitchen sink at him, but he went to the bathroom and got his tub. - Andy Roddick

When I was younger I used to lock myself in the bathroom and read in the dry tub. - Karen Russell

There are two things that Jack Bauer never does. Show mercy, and go to the bathroom. - Kiefer Sutherland

At Disneyland, you never go 'backstage' - even when you're in the bathroom. - Hideo Kojima

France is a country where the money falls apart but you can't tear the toilet paper. - Billy Wilder

The cure for a broken heart is simple, my lady. A hot bath and a good night's sleep. - Margaret George

Hiring someone to write your autobiography is like hiring someone to take a bath for you. - Mae West

I grew up with six brothers. That's how I learned to dance - waiting for the bathroom. - Bob Hope

Jitterbug: 1. A Scotchman in front of a pay toilet; 2. Insect that's had too much coffee. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Basically my wife was immature. I'd be in my bath, and she'd come in and sink my boats. - Woody Allen

Castro couldn't even go to the bathroom unless the Soviet Union put the nickel in the toilet. - Richard M Nixon

With every bathroom renovation, there are three areas that I focus on: budget, function and style. - Candice Olson

Field hockey is my strongest sport, and if I lose a game, I take a long, hot bath and moan about it. - Emma Watson

If you don't want your dog to have bad breath, do what I do: pour a little Lavoris in the toilet. - Jay Leno

I sleep with a light on in the bathroom so I can see where I'm at, because I wake up and have no clue. - Carrie Underwood

My kids always perceived the bathroom as a place where you wait it out until all the groceries are unloaded from the car. - Erma Bombeck

It's like running a marathon race. We train all hours of the day. When you are taking a bath, you are thinking of the flight. - Kalpana Chawla

I wish I had a nickel for every song that I've left in the bathroom, written down on a matchbox, or just totally forgotten about. - Tommy Shaw

Men who consistently leave the toilet seat up secretly want women to get up to go the bathroom in the middle of the night and fall in. - Rita Rudner

I worked in a health food store once. A guy came in and asked me, "If I melt dry ice, can I take a bath without getting wet?" - Steven Wright

I've got this thing for spicy stuff. Now, if you give me hot chocolate with chili pepper, a book and a bubble bath, I'm a happy girl. - Shiloh Walker

My wife was a make-up artist, and she's a total product junkie. Our bathroom is packed full of lotions and potions so I end up trying them out. - Robert Carlyle

Dogs display reluctance and wrath
If you try to give them a bath;
They bury bones in hideaways
And half the time they trot sideaways. - Ogden Nash


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