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Kickback - England

How to score an English goal at the FIFA World Cup

Kickback - England thanks to Mel Hardman

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Scotland is the Canada of England. - Rainn Wilson

England is a nation of shopkeepers. - Napoleon Bonaparte

There's no place in racism for football. - Gareth Thomas

He was not only a bore; he bored for England. - Malcolm Muggeridge

Tea to the English is really a picnic indoors. - Alice Walker

Soccer: A European warm-up exercise for rioting - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Britain's goal is not to survive, but to prevail. - Winston Churchill

The English have three vegetables and two of them are cabbage. - Walter Page

Rain is the one thing the British do better than anybody else. - Marilyn French

Britain's last gold medal was a bronze in 1952 in Helsinki. - Nigel Starmer-Smith

Football is a game designed to keep coal miners off the streets. - Jimmy Breslin

There'll always be an England, even if it's in Hollywood. - Bob Hope

In England there are sixty different religions and only one sauce. - Francesco Caracciolo

The English are not an inventive people; they don't eat enough pie. - Thomas Edison

Football Season: The time of the year when girls whistle at men in sweaters - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Jerry Ford is a nice guy, but he played too much football with his helmet off. - Lyndon Baines Johnson

I imagine hell like this: Italian punctuality, German humour and English wine. - Peter Ustinov

Football Game: A sport where a spectator takes four quarters to finish a fifth - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Humour is practically the only thing about which the English are utterly serious. - Malcolm Muggeridge

The British have a remarkable talent for keeping calm, even when there is no crisis. - Franklin P Jones

Nobody in football should be called a genius. A genius is a guy like Norman Einstein. - Joe Thiesmann

In life, as in football, you won't go far unless you know where the goalposts are. - Arnold H Glasgow

Never make fun of someone who speaks broken English. It means they know another language. - H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

To cure the British disease with socialism was like trying to cure leukemia with leeches. - Margaret Thatcher

Football isn't a contact sport; it's a collision sport. Dancing is a contact sport. - Vince Lombardi

College Professor: A man who gets what's left over after the football coach is paid off - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Oats: A grain, which in England is generally given to horses, but in Scotland supports the people - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I started out as a football player. I liked to inflict pain. In basketball, it was the same thing. - Shaquille O'Neal

Eternity: 1. The last two minutes of a football game; 2. The time between you coming and her going. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The sun never sets on the British Empire. But it rises every morning. The sky must get awfully crowded. - Steven Wright

Although he tortures the English language, he has not yet succeeded in forcing it to reveal its meaning. - J B Morton

The reason women don't play football is because 11 of them would never wear the same outfit in public. - Phyllis Diller

If you find yourself saying, "But I can't speak English...", try adding the word "... yet". - Jane Revell

I welcome him like I welcome cold sores. He's from England, he's angry, and he's got Mad Power Disease. - Paula Abdul

No bum that can't speak poifect English oughta stay in this country - oughta be de-exported the hell outta here! - Archie Bunker

The nine most terrifying words in the English language are,
"I'm from the government and I'm here to help." - Ronald Reagan

My whole body is a wreck. I've injured myself so many times with jujitsu, skateboarding, football. I guess I like to live hard. - Scott Caan

The English eat all sorts of birds - pigeons, ducks, sparrows - but if you tell them you eat puffin, you might as well come from Mars. - Bjork

Baseball happens to be a game of cumulative tension but football, basketball and hockey are played with hand grenades and machine guns. - John Leonard

Lincolnshire is the Idaho of England. You were either going to drive a tractor for the rest of your life or head for the city to work in a factory. - Bernie Taupin


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