#1 humor site on the 'net

Jim Class

Aussies know where to go for a good workout

Jim Class thanks to Howard Chapman

Howard heads to the bar for his exercise

QuotaBills
Beer speaks. People mumble. - Tony McGee

Religions change; beer and wine remain. - Hervey Allen

Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder. - Unknown

My head says gym but my heart says tacos. - Unknown

Beer. Now there's a temporary solution. - Homer Simpson

My head says gym, but my heart says donuts. - Unknown

LAN Down Under: Local Area Network in Australia - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I am pushing sixty. That is enough exercise for me. - Mark Twain

Reading is to the mind what exercise is to the body. - Joseph Addison

Australian Kiss: Same as French Kiss, only down under - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Bladder: The human apparatus that pays the tax on beer - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy. - Benjamin Franklin

I have never taken any exercise except sleeping and resting. - Mark Twain

What two ideas are more inseparable than Beer and Britannia? - Sydney Smith

I often take exercise. Only yesterday I had breakfast in bed. - Oscar Wilde

I'm only a beer teetotaller, not a champagne teetotaller. - George Bernard Shaw

A good goal is like a strenuous exercise - it makes you stretch. - Mary Kay Ash

Give me a woman who truly loves beer and I will conquer the world. - Kaiser Willhelm II

Whenever I feel the need to exercise, I lie down until it goes away. - Paul Terry

In heaven there is no beer...
That's why we drink ours here. - Unknown

After exercising I always eat pizza... just kidding. I don't exercise. - Unknown

Wouldn't exercise be more fun if calories screamed while you burned them? - Bill Murray

The world can't end today, because it's already tomorrow in Australia. - Charles M. Schulz

Exercise is king, nutrition is queen. Put them together and you have a kingdom. - Jack LaLanne

To be wholly devoted to some intellectual exercise is to have succeeded in life. - Robert Louis Stevenson

There is no exercise better for the heart than reaching down and lifting people up. - Unknown

You call this a party? The beer is warm, the women cold and I'm hot under the collar. - Groucho Marx

I exercise extreme self control. I never drink anything stronger than gin before breakfast. - WC Fields

Don't worry about the world coming to an end today. It's already tomorrow in Australia. - Charles M. Schulz

They don't make pizza or beer out of celery. And that is all you need to know about celery. - Bill Murray

Old minds are like old horses; you must exercise them if you wish to keep them in working order. - John Adams

Television remote controls encourage couch potatoes to exercise their options while broadening their base. - William Arthur Ward

When governments become large, voters cannot exercise close oversight, otherwise known as political power. - Maggie Gallagher

The Good of man is the active exercise of his soul's faculties in conformity with excellence or virtue. - Aristotle

I don't know what that gas is made of, but it can't smell any worse than Ernie Johnson 's gym bag. - Charles Barkley

Fantasy is an exercise bicycle for the mind. It might not take you anywhere, but it tones up the muscles that can. - Terry Pratchett

Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day. - George Carlin

"Exercise" is such a dirty word in my household that whenever I even think of it, I wash my mouth out with chocolate. - Leonore Fleischer

Mancation: A man's vacation. Generally includes lots of beer, a Redneck grill, slabs of meat for cooking and a sack of fireworks. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

If you sang "99 Bottles of Beer on the Wall" and counted all the numbers mentioned throughout the entire song, it would add up to 14,850. - Joe-kster


How To Tweet Others

Nutella Soother

Autumn Camouflage

Go Play Outside

Be Someone

Arkansas Divorce Application

Three Finger Carrot

Braided Horse Tail

Owl Glove

Far North Cable Guys

Openish Hours

Lead Sled Dog

Pet Food Tester

Gold Bar Carrot Cake

Looking For A Mate

Food For Thought

Kanye Twitty

Skull Tentacles

Ukrainian Cattle Car

CreepEye

Canadian Whiskey

Winter Tree

WrenchWare

Dog Sled