Insomniac Christmas

I'm good in bed. I can sleep all day. - Unknown

Silence is the sleep that nourishes wisdom. - Francis Bacon

The No. 1 cause of bankruptcies is medical bills. - Michael Moore

The best cure for insomnia is to get a lot of sleep. - WC Fields

I get really grinchy right up until Christmas morning. - Dan Aykroyd

Death - the last sleep? No, it is the final awakening. - Walter Scott

Surgeon: The person who was a cut-up at medical school - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I would rather sleep in a bathroom than in another hotel. - Billy Wilder

Halloween starts earlier and earlier, just like Christmas. - Robert Englund

Better sleep with a sober cannibal than a drunken Christian. - Herman Melville

A doctor whose breath smells has no right to medical opinion. - Martin H. Fischer

The only thing worth stealing is a kiss from a sleeping child. - Joe Houldsworth

It is the trouble that never comes that causes the loss of sleep. - Charles Austin Bates

His insomnia was so bad, he couldn't sleep during office hours. - Arthur Baer

If you can't sleep do not count the sheep, worship the Shepherd. - Unknown

Insomnia: a contagious disease often transmitted from babies to parents. - Shannon Fife

Some people talk in their sleep. Lecturers talk while other people sleep. - Albert Camus

A good laugh and a long sleep are the best cures in the Doctor's book. - Irish Proverb

The future is shaped by your dreams, so stop wasting time and go to sleep! - Unknown

Financial ruin from medical bills is almost exclusively an American disease. - Roul Turley

Men who are unhappy, like men who sleep badly, are always proud of the fact. - Bertrand Russell

As a well spent day brings happy sleep, so life well used brings happy death. - Leonardo da Vinci

There was never a child so lovely but his mother was glad to get him to sleep. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

My feet will want to walk to where you are sleeping, but I shall go on living. - Pablo Neruda

Mail your packages early, so the Post Office can lose them in time for Christmas. - Johnny Carson

Grave: A place in which the dead are laid to await the coming of the medical student - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night. - Dave Barry

Bound by paperwork, short on hands, sleep, and energy... nurses are rarely short on caring. - Sharon Hudacek

The law, in its majestic equality, forbids the rich as well as the poor to sleep under bridges. - Anatole France

I still have my Christmas Tree. I looked at it today. Sure enough, I couldn't see any forests. - Steven Wright

The best of all gifts around any Christmas tree: the presence of a family all wrapped up in each other. - Bill Vaughan

I sleep with a light on in the bathroom so I can see where I'm at, because I wake up and have no clue. - Carrie Underwood

Only one rule in medical ethics need concern you: that action on your part which best conserves the interest of your patient. - Martin H. Fischer

Sometimes I feel like a groundhog. I wish that every time I saw my workplace I could just go down the hole and go off to sleep. - Sherry Bane

Well enough for old folks to rise early, because they have done so many mean things all their lives they can't sleep anyhow. - Mark Twain

When you wake up in the morning, you have two choices: go back to sleep and dream your dreams, or wake up and chase those dreams. - Unknown

For disappearing acts, it's hard to beat what happens to the eight hours supposedly left after eight of sleep and eight of work. - Doug Larson

When I die, I want to go peacefully like my grandfather did, in his sleep. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car. - Unknown

That we are not much sicker and much madder than we are is due exclusively to that most blessed and blessing of all natural graces, sleep. - Aldous Huxley

Never play cards with a man called Doc, never eat at a place called Mom's, and never sleep with a woman whose troubles are worse than your own. - Nelson Algren