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How To Burn Fat

Simple diet plan for those with a will to succeed

How To Burn Fat thanks to Liz Ward, Squamish, B.C.

Quicker than liposuction and easy to start

QuotaBills
Diets are mainly food for thought. - N Wylie Jones

Courage is fire, and bullying is smoke. - Benjamin Disraeli

It's better to burn out than fade away. - Neil Young

Milk without fat is like nonalcoholic Scotch. - Andy Rooney

It's simple. If it jiggles, it's fat. - Arnold Schwarzenegger

Since the house is on fire let us warm ourselves. - Italian Proverb

We must rekindle the fire of idealism in our society. - Joe Biden

If someone's lying, are their pants really on fire? - Jerry Seinfeld

Words are only painted fire; a book is the fire itself. - Mark Twain

People who fight fire with fire usually end up with ashes. - Abigail Van Buren

The Irish seem to have more fire about them than the Scots. - Sean Connery

The inner fire is the most important thing mankind possesses. - Edith Sodergran

So comes snow after fire, and even dragons have their endings. - JRR Tolkien

Stay up and really burn the midnight oil. There are no compromises. - Leontyne Price

Managers light a fire under people; leaders light a fire in people. - Kathy Austin

Be enthusiastic as a leader. You can't light a fire with a wet match. - Unknown

Find a place inside where there's joy, and the joy will burn out the pain. - Joseph Campbell

With my sunglasses on, I'm Jack Nicholson. Without them, I'm fat and 60. - Jack Nicholson

The only time to eat diet food is while you're waiting for the steak to cook. - Julia Child

Success isn't a result of spontaneous combustion. You must set yourself on fire. - Arnold H Glasow

"The Hunchback Of Notre Dame" had the big fat English actor, Charles Lawson. - Archie Bunker

I used to work in a fire hydrant factory. You couldn't park anywhere near the place. - Steven Wright

Great souls by instinct by each other turn
Demand alliance, and in friendship burn. - Joseph Addison

A sense of humor is good for you. Have you ever heard of a laughing hyena with heart burn? - Bob Hope

If crime fighters fight crime and fire fighters fight fire, what do freedom fighters fight? - George Carlin

I went on a diet, swore off drinking and heavy eating, and in fourteen days I lost two weeks. - Joe E Lewis

I never worry about diets. The only carrots that interest me are the number you get in a diamond. - Mae West

I'm on a strict liquid diet: Mimosas for breakfast, Margaritas for lunch, Martinis for dinner. - Unknown

If fat people just gave skinny people more food, we could solve obesity and hunger at the same time. - Ashton Kutcher

Cigarette sales would drop to zero overnight if the warning said, "Cigarettes contain fat." - Dave Barry

"Burn everything British," he once advised his Irish countrymen, "except their coal." - Jonathan Swift

I told my doctor I get very tired when I go on a diet, so he gave me pep pills. Know what happened? I ate faster. - Joe E. Lewis

I have a microwave fireplace in my house... The other night I laid down in front of the fire for the evening in two minutes. - Steven Wright

Once in seven years I burn all my sermons; for it is a shame if I cannot write better sermons now than I did seven years ago. - John Wesley

I cannot but bless the memory of Julius Caesar, for the great esteem he expressed for fat men; and his aversion to lean ones. - David Hume

In soap, fatty acids made from boiling pork bone fat are used as a hardening agent, but also for giving it a pearl-like effect. - Christien Meindertsma

She's so fat she's my two best friends. She wears stretch caftans. She's got more chins than the Chinese telephone directory. - Joan Rivers

To have a curable illness and to leave it untreated except for prayer is like sticking your hand in a fire and asking God to remove the flame. - Sandra L. Douglas

Thank you... fat dude with giant headphones on the subway, for looking like what would've happened if Jabba the Hutt mated with Princess Leia. - Jimmy Fallon

Winter is the time for comfort, for good food and warmth, for the touch of a friendly hand and for a talk beside the fire: it is the time for home. - Edith Sitwell


Chinese Chicken Nuggets

Desert Road Bumps

Subway Swing

Fish Eye Lens

Horse Mask

Chocolate Filling

Mea Culpa Road

Pool Painters

Cocoon Stage

Eye For Coffee

Like No Udder

Egyptian Pyramid Scheme

Hammock Kayak

CARnivore

Alligator Hallucinogens

Step Lover

Iron Horse Carriage

Anon-y-moose

Kids Meal

Close Today

How Pitbulls Really Fight

Grillbillies

Captain Literate

Fossilized Sid