How To Burn Fat

Diets are mainly food for thought. - N Wylie Jones

Courage is fire, and bullying is smoke. - Benjamin Disraeli

It's better to burn out than fade away. - Neil Young

Milk without fat is like nonalcoholic Scotch. - Andy Rooney

It's simple. If it jiggles, it's fat. - Arnold Schwarzenegger

Since the house is on fire let us warm ourselves. - Italian Proverb

We must rekindle the fire of idealism in our society. - Joe Biden

If someone's lying, are their pants really on fire? - Jerry Seinfeld

Words are only painted fire; a book is the fire itself. - Mark Twain

People who fight fire with fire usually end up with ashes. - Abigail Van Buren

The Irish seem to have more fire about them than the Scots. - Sean Connery

The inner fire is the most important thing mankind possesses. - Edith Sodergran

So comes snow after fire, and even dragons have their endings. - JRR Tolkien

Stay up and really burn the midnight oil. There are no compromises. - Leontyne Price

Managers light a fire under people; leaders light a fire in people. - Kathy Austin

Be enthusiastic as a leader. You can't light a fire with a wet match. - Unknown

Find a place inside where there's joy, and the joy will burn out the pain. - Joseph Campbell

With my sunglasses on, I'm Jack Nicholson. Without them, I'm fat and 60. - Jack Nicholson

The only time to eat diet food is while you're waiting for the steak to cook. - Julia Child

Success isn't a result of spontaneous combustion. You must set yourself on fire. - Arnold H Glasow

"The Hunchback Of Notre Dame" had the big fat English actor, Charles Lawson. - Archie Bunker

I used to work in a fire hydrant factory. You couldn't park anywhere near the place. - Steven Wright

Great souls by instinct by each other turn
Demand alliance, and in friendship burn. - Joseph Addison

A sense of humor is good for you. Have you ever heard of a laughing hyena with heart burn? - Bob Hope

If crime fighters fight crime and fire fighters fight fire, what do freedom fighters fight? - George Carlin

I went on a diet, swore off drinking and heavy eating, and in fourteen days I lost two weeks. - Joe E Lewis

I never worry about diets. The only carrots that interest me are the number you get in a diamond. - Mae West

I'm on a strict liquid diet: Mimosas for breakfast, Margaritas for lunch, Martinis for dinner. - Unknown

If fat people just gave skinny people more food, we could solve obesity and hunger at the same time. - Ashton Kutcher

Cigarette sales would drop to zero overnight if the warning said, "Cigarettes contain fat." - Dave Barry

"Burn everything British," he once advised his Irish countrymen, "except their coal." - Jonathan Swift

I told my doctor I get very tired when I go on a diet, so he gave me pep pills. Know what happened? I ate faster. - Joe E. Lewis

I have a microwave fireplace in my house... The other night I laid down in front of the fire for the evening in two minutes. - Steven Wright

Once in seven years I burn all my sermons; for it is a shame if I cannot write better sermons now than I did seven years ago. - John Wesley

I cannot but bless the memory of Julius Caesar, for the great esteem he expressed for fat men; and his aversion to lean ones. - David Hume

In soap, fatty acids made from boiling pork bone fat are used as a hardening agent, but also for giving it a pearl-like effect. - Christien Meindertsma

She's so fat she's my two best friends. She wears stretch caftans. She's got more chins than the Chinese telephone directory. - Joan Rivers

To have a curable illness and to leave it untreated except for prayer is like sticking your hand in a fire and asking God to remove the flame. - Sandra L. Douglas

Thank you... fat dude with giant headphones on the subway, for looking like what would've happened if Jabba the Hutt mated with Princess Leia. - Jimmy Fallon

Winter is the time for comfort, for good food and warmth, for the touch of a friendly hand and for a talk beside the fire: it is the time for home. - Edith Sitwell