Grandma's Controller

Fishing Show: Reel-life TV. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The vertizontal hold on the TV. - Archie Bunker

Old age is no place for sissies. - Bette Davis

I'm not aging, I'm marinating. - Unknown

Old age is always 15 years older than I am. - Bernard Baruch

In television blood is thicker than talent. - Gerald F Lieberman

Aging wrinkles the body. Quitting wrinkles the soul. - Douglas MacArthur

Television has been the single greatest shaper of emptiness. - Ravi Zacharias

Aging seems to be the only available way to live a long life. - Daniel F E Auber

Let's bask in television's warm, glowing, warming glow. - Homer Simpson

I'm aging like fine wine. I'm getting complex and fruity. - Unknown

Never have I enjoyed youth so thoroughly as I have in my old age. - George Santayana

Entertainment is a thing of the past, today we've got television. - Archie Bunker

Television has brought back murder into the home... where it belongs. - Alfred Hitchcock

The tragedy of old age is not that one is old, but that one is young. - Oscar Wilde

Man does not control his own fate. The women in his life do that for him. - Groucho Marx

The key to successful aging is to pay as little attention to it as possible. - Judith Regan

I will never be an old man. To me, old age is always 15 years older than I am. - Francis Bacon

The most exciting happiness is happiness generated by forces beyond your control. - Ogden Nash

Do you realize if it weren't for Edison we'd be watching TV by candlelight? - Al Boliska

In California, they don't throw their garbage away - they make it into TV shows. - Woody Allen

If it weren't for electricity, we'd all be watching television by candlelight. - George Gobel

President Ford tells us all to bite the bullet and Betsy Ford goes on TV and shoots off her mouth. - Archie Bunker

Grandma always made you feel she had been waiting to see you all day and now the day was complete. - Marcy DeMaree

I'm a human being and I fall in love and sometimes I don't have control of every situation. - Beyonce

The control of large numbers is possible, and like unto that of small numbers, if we subdivide them. - Sun Tze

Hope is some extraordinary spiritual grace that God gives us to control our fears, not to oust them. - Vincent McNabb

You go to your TV to turn your brain off. You go to the computer when you want to turn your brain on. - Steve Jobs

TV and the Internet are good because they keep stupid people from spending too much time out in public. - Douglas Coupland

If you can't control your anger, you are as helpless as a city without walls waiting to be attacked. - Book of Proverbs

In youth the days are short and the years are long; in old age the years are short and the days are long. - Nikita I Panin

To keep the heart unwrinkled, to be hopeful, kindly, cheerful, reverent - that is to triumph over old age. - Thomas Bailey Aldrich

Personal initiative is self starting and proactive; it works independently of outside influence or control. - Unknown

I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book. - Groucho Marx

One should never make one's debut in a scandal. One should reserve that to give interest to one's old age. - Oscar Wilde

May you keep dreaming until the day you die. May imagination overtake memory. May you die young at a ripe old age. - Mark Batterson

Any fool can criticize, condemn and complain but it takes character and self control to be understanding and forgiving. - Dale Carnegie

As a family we couldn't decide whether to have Grandma buried or cremated, so in the end we decided to let her live. - Gary Delaney

The perfect date for me would be staying at home, making a big picnic in bed, eating Wotsits and cookies while watching cable TV. - Kim Kardashian

Nothing is a surprise to God; nothing is a setback to His plans; nothing can thwart His purposes; and nothing is beyond His control. - Joni Eareckson Tada