#1 humor site on the 'net

Grandma's Controller

Helping Grandma with the TV controller

Grandma's Controller thanks to Jim Serritella

Understanding Universal Remote Controls

QuotaBills
Gun Control: Using both hands - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Old age is the verdict of life. - Amelia E Barr

A TV licence is a licence to print money. - Roy Thomson

Old age is like underwear, it creeps up on you. - Unknown

Kids don't remember their best day of television. - Unknown

One of the many pleasures of old age is giving things up. - Malcolm Muggeridge

Life doesn't imitate art; it imitates bad television. - Woody Allen

One year they wanted to make me poster boy - for birth control. - Rodney Dangerfield

Old age is the most unexpected of all things that happen to a man. - Leon Trotsky

Grandma, thank you for being my anchor in this stormy sea of life. - Unknown

TV is simply a place where people go when they get tired of thinking. - Kevin Devitte

Television has brought back murder into the home... where it belongs. - Alfred Hitchcock

Cherish all your happy moments: they make a fine cushion for old age. - Christopher Morley

The tragedy of old age is not that one is old, but that one is young. - Oscar Wilde

Laws control the lesser man... Right conduct controls the greater one. - Mark Twain

So long as there's a jingle in your head, television isn't free. - Jason Love

The key to successful aging is to pay as little attention to it as possible. - Judith Regan

The nation that secures control of the air will ultimately control the world. - Alexander Graham Bell

Grandmother, as she gets older, is not fading, but becoming more concentrated. - Paulette Alden

Television has proved that people will look at anything rather than each other. - Ann Landers

Advanced old age is when you sit in a rocking chair and can't get it going. - Eliakim Katz

She was starting to think that it might be fun to be in control of the universe. - Nicki Elson

The wise man should be prepared for everything that does not lie within his control. - Pythagoras

My fault, my failure, is not in the passions I have, but in my lack of control of them. - Jack Kerouac

Old age has its pleasures, which, though different, are not less than the pleasures of youth. - W Somerset Maugham

You cannot always control what goes on outside. But you can always control what goes on inside. - Mr. Yoga

There are only three things that can kill a farmer: lightning, rolling over in a tractor, and old age. - Bill Bryson

We owe a lot to Thomas Edison - if it wasn't for him, we'd be watching television by candlelight. - Milton Berle

When it comes to old age we're all in the same boat, only some of us have been aboard a little longer. - Leo Probst

Old age is an excellent time for outrage. My goal is to say or do at least one outrageous thing every week. - Maggie Kuhn

Autumn is really the best of the seasons; and I'm not sure that old age isn't the best part of life. - C S Lewis

Our memories are card indexes consulted, and then put back in disorder, by authorities whom we do not control. - Cyril Connolly

The secret of genius is to carry the spirit of the child into old age, which means never losing your enthusiasm. - Aldous Huxley

I have this theory that chocolate slows down the aging process. It may not be true, but do I dare take the chance? - Unknown

Lord save us all from old age and broken health and a hope tree that has lost the faculty of putting out blossoms. - Mark Twain

I don't run restaurants that are out of control. We are about establishing phenomenal footholdings with talent. - Gordon Ramsay

As a family we couldn't decide whether to have Grandma buried or cremated, so in the end we decided to let her live. - Gary Delaney

Why something in the public interest such as television news can be fought over, like a chain of hamburger stands, eludes me. - Jimmy Breslin

Nothing is a surprise to God; nothing is a setback to His plans; nothing can thwart His purposes; and nothing is beyond His control. - Joni Eareckson Tada

Not one of them who took up in his youth with his opinion that there are no gods ever continued until old age faithful to his conviction. - Plato


Spanish Restrooms

First Computer Cursor

Arsenic Wafers

Car Surgeon

Rust-ic Truck

Aisle Cleanup

Camouflage Garage

World's First Laser Pointer

Patio Losers

Tetris Cake

Tower of Hammocks

Dead Batteries

Cheers!

Roger That

What Day Is It?

Blinker Fluid

Temple Car

Family Birthday Reminder

Coffee Days

New Audi

Netherlands Parking Lot

Wine Bibber

Tylenol Ban

Politician Plane