Fowl Play

Chicken: An egg factory - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Goose Pimples: Duck acne - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Quack: A duck's Doctor - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Friccastewing a chicken on the hotplate - Archie Bunker

I'm too drunk to taste this chicken. - Colonel Sanders

There's no place in racism for football. - Gareth Thomas

Soccer: A European warm-up exercise for rioting - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Academy: A modern school where football is taught - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The only thing chicken about Israel is their soup. - Bob Hope

Fan Belt: What a soccer fan uses to keep his trousers up - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

You know, I could rent you out as a decoy for duck hunters. - Groucho Marx

I played a little basketball. Some football in junior high. - Clint Eastwood

The perils of duck hunting are great - especially for the duck. - Walter Cronkite

Football is a game designed to keep coal miners off the streets. - Jimmy Breslin

It is better to have died a small boy than to fumble this football. - John Heisman

The best comfort food will always be greens, cornbread, and fried chicken. - Maya Angelou

Football Season: The time of the year when girls whistle at men in sweaters - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I believe in Coach Louis Wong. He is so much more than just a football coach. - Stephen Covey

Jerry Ford is a nice guy, but he played too much football with his helmet off. - Lyndon Baines Johnson

Football Game: A sport where a spectator takes four quarters to finish a fifth - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I love my squirrel and dumplings, but you can make it with chicken and dumplings. - Kay Robertson

I am obsessed with Costco. I love the salmon and rotisserie chicken, the dog beds. - Kris Jenner

My mother is no spring chicken although she has got as many chemicals in her as one. - Edna Everage

Ticket Scalper: A man who enables you to see one football game for the price of five - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Is this chicken or is this fish? I know it's tuna but it says chicken of the sea. - Jessica Simpson

The key to everything is patience. You get the chicken by hatching the egg, not by smashing it. - Ellen Glasgow

You know how kids dream of being soccer players or actors? Well, my dream was to be a sushi chef. - Nobu Matsuhisa

Football: A sport that bears the same relation to education that bullfighting does to agriculture - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I don't understand American football at all. It looks like all-in wrestling with crash helmets. - Sting

The chicken probably came before the egg because it is hard to imagine God wanting to sit on an egg. - Unknown

Wanting to meet a writer because you like their books is like wanting to meet a duck because you like pate. - Margaret Atwood

Any processed chicken from any place - I'll order it in a heartbeat. I'm very picky about my pork, though. - David Chang

Be like a duck, paddling and working very hard inside the water, but what everyone sees is a smiling and calm face. - Manoj Arora

Malenutrition: The practice of depriving a man from food for more than a couple of hours - or during a football game - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Shoulder Pads: The part of a football player's uniform designed to make him look as fearsome as a female executive - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I love lean meats like chicken, turkey. I'm obsessed with sushi and fish in general. I eat a lot of veggies and hummus. - Shawn Johnson

I like a well-roasted rotisserie chicken and eggs cooked various ways like sunny-side up or scrambled. It's comfort food for me. - Joel Robuchion

The difference between involvement and commitment is like an eggs and ham breakfast: the chicken was involved, the pig was committed. - Unknown

What's the two things they tell you are healthiest to eat? Chicken and fish. You know what you should do? Combine them, eat a penguin. - Dave Attell

Being in politics is like being a football coach; you have to be smart enough to understand the game, and dumb enough to think it's important. - Eugene McCarthy