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When in doubt, duck. - Malcolm Forbes

Friccastewing a chicken on the hotplate - Archie Bunker

I'm too drunk to taste this chicken. - Colonel Sanders

There's no place in racism for football. - Gareth Thomas

The only thing chicken about Israel is their soup. - Bob Hope

Wrestlers are a bunch of wanna-be football players. - Brian Bosworth

Foosball is a combination of soccer and shish kabobs. - Mitch Hedberg

Fan Belt: What a soccer fan uses to keep his trousers up - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

You know, I could rent you out as a decoy for duck hunters. - Groucho Marx

I played a little basketball. Some football in junior high. - Clint Eastwood

The perils of duck hunting are great - especially for the duck. - Walter Cronkite

The best comfort food will always be greens, cornbread, and fried chicken. - Maya Angelou

The calendar and the clock are all set by football season and the off-season. - Tom Coughlin

Jerry Ford is a nice guy, but he played too much football with his helmet off. - Lyndon Baines Johnson

I am obsessed with Costco. I love the salmon and rotisserie chicken, the dog beds. - Kris Jenner

Nobody in football should be called a genius. A genius is a guy like Norman Einstein. - Joe Thiesmann

He who waits for a roast duck to fly into his mouth must wait a very, very long time. - Chinese Proverb

In life, as in football, you won't go far unless you know where the goalposts are. - Arnold H Glasgow

Football isn't a contact sport; it's a collision sport. Dancing is a contact sport. - Vince Lombardi

I unfortunately still crave chicken McNuggets and bacon, which is the meat candy of the world. - Katy Perry

I asked my hairdresser what would look good on me. She says a Los Angeles Rams football helmet. - Phyllis Diller

My brother thinks he's a chicken.
We don't talk him out of it because we need the eggs. - Groucho Marx

I started out as a football player. I liked to inflict pain. In basketball, it was the same thing. - Shaquille O'Neal

I don't understand American football at all. It looks like all-in wrestling with crash helmets. - Sting

The chicken probably came before the egg because it is hard to imagine God wanting to sit on an egg. - Unknown

Love, like a chicken salad or restaurant hash, must be taken with blind faith or it loses its flavor. - Helen Rowland

I'm going to the Colonel next. I'm gonna get a big bucket of chicken chests and smashed potatoes. - Archie Bunker

Wanting to meet a writer because you like their books is like wanting to meet a duck because you like pate. - Margaret Atwood

As a kid, you looked forward to Charlie Brown during Halloween and you looked forward to Monday Night Football. - Nick Ferguson

I walk like a duck: very straight up and down. Or like a penguin. It's a dead giveaway that I'm a dancer. - David Hallberg

Be like a duck, paddling and working very hard inside the water, but what everyone sees is a smiling and calm face. - Manoj Arora

I love lean meats like chicken, turkey. I'm obsessed with sushi and fish in general. I eat a lot of veggies and hummus. - Shawn Johnson

Baseball players are smarter than football players. How often do you see a baseball team penalized for too many men on the field? - Jim Bouton

My whole body is a wreck. I've injured myself so many times with jujitsu, skateboarding, football. I guess I like to live hard. - Scott Caan

I like a well-roasted rotisserie chicken and eggs cooked various ways like sunny-side up or scrambled. It's comfort food for me. - Joel Robuchion

The difference between involvement and commitment is like an eggs and ham breakfast: the chicken was involved, the pig was committed. - Unknown

Baseball happens to be a game of cumulative tension but football, basketball and hockey are played with hand grenades and machine guns. - John Leonard

What's the two things they tell you are healthiest to eat? Chicken and fish. You know what you should do? Combine them, eat a penguin. - Dave Attell

Take two turkeys, one goose, four cabbages, but no duck, and mix them together. After one taste, you'll duck soup for the rest of your life. - Groucho Marx

Being in politics is like being a football coach; you have to be smart enough to understand the game, and dumb enough to think it's important. - Eugene McCarthy


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