Flatulent Cow
Gas blowout spotted on Canadian prairies
Finding a cure for cows with bad gas
Latest in Blowout prevention
Natural Gas exploration in the MoistWet Territories
Finding an Illusive Cure for Farm Cows with Bad Gas
QuotaBillsNever kick a cow chip on a hot day. - Will Rogers
Sacred cows make the best hamburger. - Mark Twain
We are here on Earth to fart around. - Kurt Vonnegut
Milk the cow but do not pull off the udder. - Greek Proverb
Why buy a cow if you can get the milk for free. - English Proverb
We can dance on pinheads till the cows come home. - Alastair Campbell
Going to law is losing a cow for the sake of a cat. - Mark Twain
Change is like a charging cow. Don't ignore it - milk it. - Andrew Leigh
Heifer cow is better than none, but this is no time for puns. - Groucho Marx
Mrs. O'Leary's cow is sorry, but Cleveland burned anyway. - Archie Bunker
The cow is of the bovine ilk;
One end is moo, the other milk. - Ogden Nash
That Gerald Ford. He can't fart and chew gum at the same time. - Lyndon B. Johnson
All the good ideas I ever had came to me while I was milking a cow. - Grant Wood
Traveling through hyperspace ain't like dusting crops, farm boy. - Han Solo
You should never hesitate to trade your cow for a handful of magic beans. - Tom Robbins
From every Englishman emanates a kind of gas, the deadly choke-lamp of boredom. - Heinrich Heine
Why do they lock gas station bathrooms? Are they afraid someone will clean them? - George Carlin
Here lies the body of Jonathan Blake.
Stepped on the gas instead of the brake. - Jonathan Blake
I fart in your general direction. Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries. - Monty Python Anb The Holy Grail
If I don't work, I'll be sitting on the couch watching TV, eating popcorn and getting like a cow. - Celia Cruz
I'm a farm boy. If we need five people to haul in hay, we don't take one and just work them to death. - Lincoln Davis
I don't know what that gas is made of, but it can't smell any worse than Ernie Johnson 's gym bag. - Charles Barkley
The wonderful world of home appliances now makes it possible to cook indoors with charcoal and outdoors with gas. - Bill Vaughan
I hooked up my accelerator pedal in my car to my brake lights. I hit the gas, people behind me stop, and I'm gone. - Steven Wright
The reason gas prices are so high is because the oil is in Texas and Oklahoma and all the dipsticks are in Washington. - Yakov Smirnoff
I could dance with you till the cows come home...
on second thought, I'll dance with the cows till you come home. - Groucho Marx
For almost seventy years the life insurance industry has been a smug sacred cow feeding the public a steady line of sacred bull. - Ralph Nader
Canada is like an old cow. The West feeds it. Ontario and Quebec milk it. And you can well imagine what it's doing in the Maritimes. - Tommy Douglas
Oil prices have fallen lately. We include this news for the benefit of gas stations, which otherwise wouldn't learn of it for six months. - Bill Tammeus
Money is like gasoline during a road trip. You don't want to run out of gas on your trip, but you're not doing a tour of gas stations. - Tim O'Reilly
Free speech is not to be regulated like diseased cattle and impure butter. The audience that hissed yesterday may applaud today, even for the same performance. - William O. Douglas
When Thomas Edison worked late into the night on the electric light, he had to do it by gas lamp or candle. I'm sure it made the work seem that much more urgent. - George Carlin
Should any political party attempt to abolish social security, unemployment insurance, and eliminate labor laws and farm programs, you would not hear of that party again in our political history. - Dwight D Eisenhower