#1 humor site on the 'net

Ent Tree Art

Tolkien Trees come alive in the park

Ent Tree Art thanks to Wayne Nowazek

Ents are a race of beings in Tolkien's fantasy world Middle-earth who resemble trees

Ents are a race of beings in J. R. R. Tolkien's fantasy world Middle-earth who resemble trees
QuotaBills
A little axe can cut down a big tree. - Jamaican Saying

Trees often transplanted seldom prosper. - Flemish Proverb

What kind of man gives cigarettes to trees? - Robin Williams

Time spent amongst trees is never wasted time. - Katrina Mayer

The trees that are slow to grow bear the best fruit. - Moliere

Botany: The art of insulting flowers in Greek and Latin. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

By trying often, the monkey learns to jump from the tree. - Cameroon Proverb

He knows his olive trees better than he knows his children. - Rebecca Helm-Ropelato

I think that I shall never see
A poem lovely as a tree. - Joyce Kilmer

Native ability without education is like a tree without fruit. - Aristippus

When you think about a walking tree, laughter is the response. - John Rhys-Davies

Character is the root of the tree; conduct, the fruit it bears. - E.M. Bounds

The best time to plant a tree was 20 years ago. The second best time is now. - Chinese Proverb

Learn not to talk to me. You shake the tree, a leopard's going to fall out. - Kobe Bryant

Southerners are so devoted to genealogy that we see a family tree under every bush. - Florence King

If my Valentine you won't be,
I'll hang myself on your Christmas tree. - Ernest Hemingway

The true meaning of life is to plant trees, under whose shade you do not expect to sit. - Nelson Henderson

Chocolate comes from coco, which is a tree - that makes it a plant. Chocolate is salad. - Unknown

Smart people that like good health spend several hours outdoors daily in the shade of trees. - Steven Magee

Shady Character: A fellow who snoozes in a hammock under a tree while his wife mows the lawn - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Even if I knew that tomorrow the world would go to pieces, I would still plant my apple tree. - Martin Luther

If I had six hours to chop down a tree, I'd spend the first four hours sharpening the axe. - Abraham Lincoln

Knowing trees, I understand the meaning of patience. Knowing grass, I can appreciate persistence. - Hal Borland

I still have my Christmas Tree. I looked at it today. Sure enough, I couldn't see any forests. - Steven Wright

It's better to fall from a tree and break your back than to fall in love and break your heart. - African Proverb

How is it one careless match can start a forest fire, but it takes a whole box to start a campfire? - Unknown

The reason there are so many tree-lined boulevards in Paris is so the German army can march in the shade. - George S Patton

Except during the nine months before he draws his first breath, no man manages his affairs as well as a tree does. - George Bernard Shaw

Lord save us all from old age and broken health and a hope tree that has lost the faculty of putting out blossoms. - Mark Twain

If a man is standing in the middle of the forest speaking and there is no woman around to hear him... is he still wrong? - George Carlin

When we save the rain forest, the polar bear, and Al Gore, we should party so hard that Canada calls the cops on us for noise. - Paula Poundstone

When anyone asks me about the Irish character, I say look at the trees. Maimed, stark and misshapen, but ferociously tenacious. - Unknown

Hunters will tell you that a moose is a wily and ferocious forest creature. Nonsense. A moose is a cow drawn by a three-year-old. - Bill Bryson

I glanced out the window at the signs of spring. The sky was almost blue, the trees were almost budding, the sun was almost bright. - Millard Kaufman

I think trees should bloom earlier in the spring. They act like they are on a schedule. It’s not like they have anywhere to go. - Jarod Kintz

On the top of the Crumpetty Tree
The Quangle Wangle sat,
But his face you could not see,
On account of his Beaver Hat. - Edward Lear

Wolves directly affect the entire ecosystem, not just moose populations, their main prey, because less moose equals more tree growth. - Rolf Peterson

Only when the last tree has withered, and the last fish caught, and the last river been poisoned, will we realize we cannot eat money. - Cree Proverb

Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it was stupid. - Albert Einstein

I think that I shall never see
A billboard lovely as a tree;
Perhaps, unless the billboards fall,
I'll never see a tree at all. - Ogden Nash


Invisible Patient

Cellfie

Soccer City

Mom Lookout

Texas Gun Lover

Hi Heel Running Shoes

Salmon Bikini

Mirror Lake

Socialist Job

Graveyard Sundae

Portable Dog Carriers

No More Arguing

Transformers Garage

Soccer Ball Building

Country Office

Lord Of The Rinse

Introvert Soap

No Drowning

Window View

Vanishing Underwater Roller Coaster

Simple Surgery

Applelicious

Fried Eggs - Military Style

Tourist Baggage