#1 humor site on the 'net

Death Foretold

Crocodile safety while swimming Down Under

Death Foretold thanks to Eddy Joyce, Armadale, West Australia

Beware of crocs in Australian waters

QuotaBills
Death ends a life, not a relationship. - Jack Lemmon

Liberty for wolves is death to the lambs. - Isaiah Berlin

It is not death that alarms me, but dying. - Michel De Montaigne

LAN Down Under: Local Area Network in Australia - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

What happens if you get scared half to death twice? - Steven Wright

Death is the greatest evil, because it cuts off hope. - William Hazlitt

Death is nature's way of telling you to slow down. - Unknown

If we do not know about life, how can we know about death? - Confucius

Even death is not to be feared by one who has lived wisely. - Gautama Siddharta

The American Way of life, si! The American Way of death, no! - Archie Bunker

Because I could not stop for Death He kindly stopped for me. - Emily Dickinson

Death is not the end. There remains the litigation over the estate. - Ambrose Bierce

He is one of those people who would be enormously improved by death. - H.H. Munro

If life must not be taken too seriously, then so neither must death. - Samuel Butler

Death is nothing, but to live defeated and inglorious is to die daily. - Napoleon Bonaparte

In this world nothing can be said to be certain, except death and taxes. - Benjamin Franklin

Adam, the first great benefactor of our race. He brought death into the world. - Mark Twain

Never knock on death's door. Ring the bell and run away. Death hates that. - Matt Frewer

You care so much you feel as though you will bleed to death with the pain of it. - J K Rowling

However much you may try to delay, you are fated to meet the same death as I did. - Tiberius Gracchus

Life is pleasant. Death is peaceful. It's the transition that's troublesome. - Isaac Asimov

Use your imagination not to scare yourself to death but to inspire yourself to life. - Adele Brookman

When New Zealanders emigrate to Australia, it raises the average IQ of both countries. - Robert Muldoon

I'm a Catholic and I can't commit suicide, but I plan to drink myself to death. - Jack Kerouac

Death is not extinguishing the light; it is putting out the lamp because dawn has come. - Rabindranath Tagore

A gun is not a weapon, it’s a tool, like a hammer or a screwdriver or an alligator. - Homer Simpson

In the night of death, hope sees a star, and listening love can hear the rustle of a wing. - Robert Ingersoll

For three days after death hair and fingernails continue to grow but phone calls taper off. - Johnny Carson

Easter is a time when God turned the inevitability of death into the invincibility of life. - Craig D Loundsbrough

Don't worry about the world coming to an end today. It's already tomorrow in Australia. - Charles M. Schulz

We are here to laugh at the odds and live our lives so well that Death will tremble to take us. - Charles Bukowski

The difference between death and taxes is death doesn't get worse every time Congress meets. - Will Rogers

Life is better than death, if only because it is less boring, and because it has fresh peaches in it. - Alice Walker

I'm a farm boy. If we need five people to haul in hay, we don't take one and just work them to death. - Lincoln Davis

When you reach the stars, boy, yes, and live there forever, all the fears will go, and Death himself will die. - Ray Bradbury

To be idle is a short road to death and to be diligent is a way of life; foolish people are idle, wise people are diligent. - Buddha

Success is like death. The more successful you become, the higher the houses in the hills get and the higher the fences get. - Kevin Spacey

Sir, your remarks are repugnant to me, and I disagree with your viewpoints. But I will defend to the death your right to express them. - Voltaire

Today is yesterday's victory, yesterday is tomorrow's conquest, and tomorrow is today's war. Though I face death, I am not fearsome. - Nad├Ęge Richards

Thirteen roadways lead through life
To thirteen doors of death,
Homeward from foolish fears and strife
We float on failing breath. - Tao


Uncommon Name

DMV Office

Meat You In The Locker Room

Football Chicks

Baby's Dog Rug

Chair Folders

Seeing Eye Cat

Swim Fingers

Vatican Wall

Computer Multitasker - He Be Da' Man!

Modern Romance

T-Shirt Answer

Handbell Registration

Spamdex Pork Shorts

What's Your Blues Name?

Big Sister vs Big Brother

Growing Own Pot

Boat Tram

Duct Tape Wall Bed

Pilot Lounge

How Do You Like Your Steak?

Chopper Bike

Bed Bug

Truck Load