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Cooking For Guys

Cookbook for a bachelor's kitchen

Cooking For Guys thanks to Howard Chapman

Meal recipe for a bachelor: (A) simple, (b) quick, and (C) lots of it

QuotaBills
Talk doesn't cook rice. - Chinese Proverb

Sushi Vendor: A sell-fish guy - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The bad guys always get a vote. - Navy saying

One can say everything best over a meal. - George Eliot

Life is short. Eat cookies for breakfast. - Unknown

Char: Common method of cooking over a campfire - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Home cooking. Where many a man thinks his wife is. - Jimmy Durante

Trapeze Artist: A guy who gets the hang of things. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I don't even butter my bread. I consider that cooking. - Katherine Cebrian

My wife is such a bad cook, in my house we pray after the meal. - Rodney Dangerfield

Cooking certain dishes, like roast pork, reminds me of my mother. - Maya Angelou

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you didn't cook it! - Gordon Ramsay

Arbitrator: A cook that leaves Arby's to work for McDonald's. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Carpenter: 1. A guy who nails down his agreement; 2. A shelf made man. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Every politician should have been born an orphan and remain a bachelor. - Lady Bird Johnson

The only time to eat diet food is while you're waiting for the steak to cook. - Julia Child

The only good thing about him is his cook. The world visits his dinners, not him. - Moliere

We can learn much from wise words, little from wisecracks, and less from wise guys. - William Arthur Ward

In hotel rooms I worry. I can't be the only guy who sits on the furniture naked. - Jonathan Katz

Nobody in football should be called a genius. A genius is a guy like Norman Einstein. - Joe Thiesmann

People want honest, flavourful food, not some show-off meal that takes days to prepare. - Ted Allen

If you meet someone who can cook and do housework, don't hesitate a minute - marry him! - Rita Rudner

Show me a guy who's afraid to look bad, and I'll show you a guy you can beat every time. - Lou Brock

The secret of managing is to keep the 5 guys who hate you away from the 5 guys who are undecided. - Casey Stengel

You see a lot of smart guys with dumb women, but you hardly ever see a smart woman with a dumb guy. - Erica Jong

I like cookies, any cookie you put in front of me - animal cookies, sugar cookies, anything crunchy. - Maria Shriver

It was so hot today that Burger King was singing, 'if you want it your way, cook it yourself.' - Johnny Carson

I tend to play mostly villains and twisted people. Unsavory guys. I think it's my face, the way I look. - Christopher Walken

Truck Driver: 1. A man who has the opportunity to run into so many nice people; 2. A guy who goes the route. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I'm not always optimistic. You wouldn't have all cylinders cooking if you were always like Mary Poppins. - Carol Burnett

What my mother believed about cooking is that if you worked hard and prospered, someone else would do it for you. - Nora Ephron

For my last meal, I'd want an Irish breakfast with soda bread and one of my dad's omelettes with three or four eggs. - Erin O'Connor

A husband is a guy who tells you when you’ve got on too much lipstick and helps you with your girdle when your hips stick. - Ogden Nash

I've got a great doctor. He gave a guy six months to live. They couldn't pay his bill so he gave him another six months. - Henny Youngman

At the age of six I wanted to be a cook. At seven I wanted to be Napoleon. And my ambition has been growing steadily ever since. - Salvador Dali

The perfect date for me would be staying at home, making a big picnic in bed, eating Wotsits and cookies while watching cable TV. - Kim Kardashian

There is one thing more exasperating than a spouse who can cook and won't... and that's a spouse who can't cook and will. - Robert Frost

I'm not a bad guy! I work hard, and I love my kids. So why should I spend half my Sunday hearing about how I'm going to hell? - Homer Simpson

A cookie store is a bad idea. Besides, the market research reports say America likes crispy cookies, not soft and chewy cookies like you make. - Unknown

When I walk down the street in New York, the building constructor, the guy pounding cement and what not, will yell, "Hey, you hockey puck!" - Don Rickles


1st Rolex

Tennis Plant

Florida Moves Out Of Hurricane Zone

Small Bills

Denmark Traffic Signals

Nail Polish Lookalilikes

Game Car

Overloaded Mailbox

Redneck Phone

Enjoy Fresh Air

Bread Board

Snaccident

Mini Bar

Frisbee Stopper

Redneck Sushi

Redneck's Lo-Tech Mobile Phone

Downchuck

Border Agent Alert

Cadillac Clearance

Leading By Example

Wired For Coffee

Cadillac Bike

Chip and Dip

Cat Couch Nap