Computer Resuscitation

Defect-free software does not exist. - Wietse Venema

I use a Mac to help me design the next Cray. - Seymoure Cray

The internet is a great way to get on the net. - Bob Dole

I took the initiative in creating the internet. - Al Gore

A girl with cotton stockings never sees a mouse. - American Proverb

Real Soon Now: When the software will be shipped - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The mouse that fears the trap has already been trapped. - Marty Rubin

People will believe anything they read on the internet. - Abraham Lincoln

Never trust a computer you can't throw out a window. - Steve Wozniak

The computer is down. I hope it's something serious. - Stanton Delaplane

Sleep is so cute when it tries to compete with the internet. - Will Ferrell

The Internet is a telephone system that's gotten uppity. - Clifford Stoll

There is no reason anyone would want a computer in their home. - Ken Olson

To err is human - and to blame it on a computer is even more so. - Robert Orben

If the cat sits long enough at the hole, it will catch the mouse. - Irish proverb

To err is human, but to really foul things up you need a computer. - Paul Ehrlich

The Internet treats censorship as a malfunction and routes around it. - John P Barlow

The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese. - Steven Wright

A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing. - Emo Philips

It is better to be a mouse in a cat's mouth than a man in a lawyer's hands. - Spanish Proverb

Keyboard Plaque: The disgusting buildup of dirt and crud found on computer keyboards - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Please leave my computer alone. The only cookies I want to get are the ones I can eat. - Heather Wolf

Keyboard: 1. Place to hang your keys; 2. The standard way to generate computer errors. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I almost sent you a real birthday card but thankfully my internet connection came back. - Unknown

Internet: The best library in the world, but with all its books strewn across the floor - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Learning by doing, peer-to-peer teaching, and computer simulation are all part of the same equation. - Nicholas Negroponte

TV and the Internet are good because they keep stupid people from spending too much time out in public. - Douglas Coupland

I use a computer. I don't know if that qualifies me as a techie, but I'm pretty good on the computer. - Leonard Nimoy

The Internet has turned what used to be a controlled, one-way message into a real-time dialogue with millions. - Danielle Sacks

They've finally come up with the perfect office computer. If it makes a mistake, it blames another computer. - Milton Berle

I don't like creating software anymore. It's too exact. It's like karate; there's no room for error. - John Maeda

The new information technology (Internet and e-mail) have practically eliminated the physical costs of communications. - Peter F Drucker

Until Facebook came along, there was hardly anywhere on the public Internet where you had to operate with your real name. - David Kirkpatrick

Before you marry a person, you should first make them use a computer with slow internet service to see who they really are. - Will Ferrell

My favorite thing about the Internet is that you get to go into the private world of real creeps without having to smell them. - Penn Jillette

The Internet is the most important single development in the history of human communication since the invention of call waiting. - Dave Barry

One of the simple but genuine pleasures in life is getting up in the morning and hurrying to a mouse trap you set the night before. - Kin Hubbard

Cell phones, mobile e-mail, and all the other cool and slick gadgets can cause massive losses in our creative output and overall productivity. - Robin S Sharma

I went to the hardware store and bought some used paint. It was in the shape of a house. I also bought some batteries, but they weren't included. - Steven Wright

The problem with the internet is that it gives you everything - reliable material and crazy material. So the problem becomes, how do you discriminate? - Umberto Eco