#1 humor site on the 'net

Chocolate Filling

How Australians add water to their Chocolate Liqueur

Chocolate Filling thanks to Howard Chapman

Aussie ice cubes for a sweet tooth

QuotaBills
Wine is bottled poetry. - Robert Louis Stevenson

Chocolate cake is the bomb! - Scarlett Pomers

Payday came and with it beer. - Rudyard Kipling

When the wine is in, the wit is out. - English Proverb

Religions change; beer and wine remain. - Hervey Allen

When wine goes in strange things come out. - Friedrich Schiller

Every cask smells of the wine it contains. - Spanish Proverb

We only serve fine wine. Did you bring any? - Unknown

I owe it all to little chocolate doughnuts. - John Belushi

Behind every good woman is a lot of chocolate. - Unknown

Talking to you is like casting pearls into wine. - Archie Bunker

A little chocolate a day keeps the doctor at bay. - Marcia Carrington

I've never met a chocolate I didn't like. - Unknown

What whiskey will not cure, there is no cure for. - Irish Proverb

Things are getting worse. Please send more chocolate. - Unknown

I cook with wine; sometimes I even add it to the food. - WC Fields

Man can not live on chocolate alone.... but women can. - Unknown

Some call it Cocktail Hour. To me, it's a support group. - Unknown

What two ideas are more inseparable than Beer and Britannia? - Sydney Smith

Stop trying to make everybody happy - you're not tequila. - Unknown

Drinking rum before noon makes you a pirate, not an alcoholic. - Unknown

I never drank anything stronger than beer before I was twelve. - WC Fields

Coffee and chocolate - the inventor of mocha should be sainted. - Cherise Sinclair

I'm aging like fine wine. I'm getting complex and fruity. - Unknown

Chocolate is medicinal. I just did another study that confirms it. - Michelle M. Pillow

Venice is like eating an entire box of chocolate liqueurs in one go. - Truman Capote

Too much of anything is bad. Too much of good whisky is barely enough. - Mark Twain

A raise is like a martini: it elevates the spirit, but only temporarily. - Dan Seligman

Chocolate makes otherwise normal people melt into strange states of ecstasy. - John West

A nice creamy chocolate cake does a lot for a lot of people; it does for me. - Audrey Hepburn

Moderation, honey, in all things but love and chocolate. That's my motto. - Barbara Bretton

Of all the gin joints in all the towns in all the world, she walks into mine. - Casablanca

If you get melted chocolate all over your hands, you're eating it too slowly. - Unknown

Some people are chocolate and sweets people. I love French fried. That and caviar. - Cameron Diaz

Logic, like whiskey, loses its beneficial effect when taken in too large quantities. - Lord Dunsany

I love to sing, and I love to drink scotch. Most people would rather hear me drink scotch. - George Burns

The greatest tragedies were written by the Greeks and Shakespeare... neither knew chocolate. - Sandra Boynton

Chocolate comes from cocoa, which is a plant. Therefore, chocolate counts as salad. The End. - Unknown

They don't make pizza or beer out of celery. And that is all you need to know about celery. - Bill Murray

An Irishman after trying American beer for the first time: "Put it back in the horse!" - Unknown

He's so full of alcohol, if you put a lighted wick in his mouth he'd burn for three days. - Groucho Marx

Great people talk about ideas, average people talk about things, and small people talk about wine. - Fran Lebowitz

When the clergyman's daughter
Drinks nothing but water
She's certain to finish on gin. - Rudyard Kipling

Then she thought bitterly that it would be much easier to resist chocolate if her life were less stressful. - J K Rowling

Dear Diamond,
We all know who is really a girl's best friend.
Yours sincerely,
Chocolate Cake - Unknown

Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day. - George Carlin

In those days the best painkiller was ice. It wasn't addictive, and it was particularly effective if you poured some whiskey over it. - George Burns

Irish whiskey was first developed for its medicinal benefits. It's just lucky for the rest of us that the Irish are such a sickly bunch. - Unknown

Alcohol is not in my vodkabulary. However, I looked it up on whiskeypedia and learned if you drink too much of it, it's likely tequilya. - Unknown

The simple act of opening a bottle of wine has brought more happiness to the human race than all the collective governments in the history of earth. - Jim Harrison


Whiskey Jig

Redneck Mercedes

Hala Fruit

Hydro Water Power

Selfie Shoes

Tons Of Anarchy

Science World

Da Hood Shirt

What Do You See? - Part III

ThaiTanic

Aging Mermaid

Get Along Shirt

Bruce Lee Coffee

Dry Satellite

Carving The Turkey

Don't Break The Window

Nike Coffin

Redneck Ladder

Proof of Global Warming

Leading a Remote Life

Centaur of Attraction

Papa Burger

High Five, Son

What Do You See? - Part II