#1 humor site on the 'net

Cassowary Warning

Road safety sign puts Aussie bird 'Down Under'

Cassowary Warning thanks to Eddy Joyce, Armadale, West Australia

Wile E. Coyote catches an Australian Road Runner

Cassowaries are flightless birds, part of the ratite group, which also includes the emu, rheas, ostriches, and kiwis, and the extinct moas and elephant birds. They're native to the tropical forests of New Guinea and northeastern Australia.

QuotaBills
Fowl: A four-letter bird. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

A married man is a caged bird. - Spanish Proverb

Birds of a feather flock together. - English Proverb

Crowbar: Where birds can get a drink. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Wishing to be a bird so you can Fly Away. - Unknown

A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush. - English Proverb

The littlest birds sing the prettiest songs. - Tanyas

Birds born in a cage think flying is an illness. - Alejandro Jodorowsky

If you can't be a good example, be a warning. - Unknown

No bird soars too high if he soars with his own wings. - William Blake

Intelligence without ambition is a bird without wings. - Salvador Dali

The bird is powered by its own life and by its motivation. - Abdul Kalam

The Bird of Hermes is my name, eating my wings to make me tame. - Kohta Hirano

A bird in the hand is a certainty, but a bird in the bush may sing. - Bret Harte

In software systems it is often the early bird that makes the worm. - Alan Perlis

The bird of paradise alights only upon the hand that does not grasp. - John Berry

Woodpecker: 1. A knocking bird; 2. A 17th Century prosthetic device. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Impeccable: 1. Having immunity to woodpeckers; 2. Hidden from birds. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese. - Steven Wright

In order to see birds it is necessary to become a part of the silence. - Robert Lynd

Though what bird in the best of circumstances does not look a little stricken? - Lorrie Moore

The bird, the bee, the running child are all the same to the sliding glass door. - Demetri Martin

I know of only one bird (the parrot) that talks; and it can't fly very high. - Wilbur Wright

I spent a lot of my money on booze, birds and fast cars... the rest I squandered. - George Best

A bird doesn't sing because it has an answer; it sings because it has a song. - Lou Holtz

It's just a job. Grass grows, birds fly, waves pound the sand. I beat people up. - Muhammad Ali

Birds find shelter during the rain, but eagles avoid rain by flying above the clouds. - Abdul Kalam

My husband, Fang, is so dumb I once said, "There's a dead bird." He looked up. - Phyllis Diller

Be grateful for luck. Pay the thunder no mind. Listen to the birds. And don't hate nobody. - Eubie Blake

A bird that you set free may be caught again, but a word that escapes your lips will not return. - Jewish Proverb

I'd rather learn from one bird how to sing than to teach ten thousand stars how not to dance. - e e cummings

If you turn the imagination loose like a hunting dog, it will often return with the bird in its mouth. - William Maxwell

We could not understand that there was anything about a bird that could not be built on a larger scale. - Orville Wright

Just as the bird sings or the butterfly soars, because it is his natural characteristic, so the artist works. - Alma Gluck

Mosquito: 1. A small insect designed by God to make us think better of flies; 2. The state bird of New Jersey. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The reason birds can fly and we can't is simply because they have perfect faith, for to have faith is to have wings. - J.M. Barrie

You can't be suspicious of a tree, or accuse a bird or a squirrel of subversion or challenge the ideology of a violet. - Hal Borland

You are Mr. Owl. I am Ms. Hummingbird. We may come from different species but as long as you're a bird, I'm a bird too. - Glad Munaiseche

It's a good thing we have gravity or else when birds died they'd just stay right up there. Hunters would be all confused. - Steven Wright

A male frigate bird blows up a wild red pouch on his neck. He can keep it puffed up for hours. It is his way of impressing the girls. - Julie Murphy


Long Winter

2022 Hooters Owl and Birds of Prey Calendars

New 50 Pence Coin

Truck Art

Redneck Chair Repair

Bus Head Rest

How Big Was It?

Islanders

Extra Weight

Snowgazers

Happy Australia Day!

Starting Your Fireplace On The Roof

Snow Prayers

Snowbaru

Mirror Image

Hurricane Protection

Spot the Thief

Firm Egg

Winter Chair

Storage Puzzle

Training Wheels

School Nap

Reserved for Drunk Drivers

Find The Lady