Canadian Car Crash

Never insult anyone by accident. - Robert A. Heinlein

Canada was built on dead beavers. - Margaret Atwood

I get to go to overseas places, like Canada. - Britney Spears

Name the greatest of all inventors. Accident. - Mark Twain

Sorry, there is no STAR on the stage tonight! - Donald Trump

Sorry, I'm still a dialectical materialist. - Fidel Castro

The police are recruited from the criminal classes. - Gore Vidal

The police must obey the law while enforcing the law. - Earl Warren

Canada has always been there to help people who need it. - Justin Trudeau

I'm sorry, if you were right, I'd agree with you. - Robin Williams

Canada is like a loft apartment over a really great party. - Robin Williams

I did a lot of things as a Muslim that I am sorry for now. - Malcolm X

Grab a chance and you won't be sorry for a might have been. - Arthur Mitchell Ransome

Coward: One who, in a perilous emergency, thinks with his legs. - Ambrose Bierce

You have to know a man awfully well in Canada to know his surname. - John Buchan

If you call ham "Canadian bacon", what do you call bacon? - Michael Kelso

I've only been to these foreign countries: Canada, L.A. and Miami. - Larry the Cable Guy

For our immediate family and relatives, Canada was a land of opportunity. - Sidney Altman

I used to go missing a lot... Miss Canada, Miss United Kingdom, Miss World. - George Best

The police are not here to create disorder, they;re here to preserve disorder. - Richard J Daley

If the police arrest a mime, do they tell him he has the right to remain silent? - George Carlin

I saw a notice which said "Drink Canada Dry" and I've just started. - Brendan Behan

As far as single payer, it works in Canada. It works incredibly well in Scotland. - Donald Trump

I came from Canada, where it's freezing cold for seven months out of the year. - Rachelle Lefevre

I felt sorry for myself because I had no hands until I met a man who had no chips. - Kent Andersson

Canada is a good country to be from. It has a gentler slower pace - it lends perspective. - Paul Anka

I love working in Canada. The ovation is great. It makes me feel like I'm the top dog. - Owen Hart

I am on your Walk of Fame in Toronto. My sense of humour is Canadian. But I can't vote. - Donald Sutherland

The toilets at a local police station have been stolen. Police say they have nothing to go on. - Ronnie Corbett

Police officers may drive black and white cars, however what goes on in their job is a lot of gray. - Arik Matson

If you're going to do something tonight that you'll be sorry for tomorrow morning, sleep late. - Henny Youngman

Faith is a fine invention
When Gentlemen can see -
But Microscopes are prudent
In an Emergency. - Emily Dickinson

I have left orders to be awakened at any time in case of national emergency, even if I'm in a cabinet meeting. - Ronald Reagan

I haven't reported my missing credit card to the police because whoever stole it is spending less than my wife. - Ilie Nastase

I was born in Canada for a reason. It was because my parents wanted me to have the freedoms that this country offers. - Patrick Chan

I'm being kidnapped by a comforter, sheet and pillow. No need to call the police for I will be released by morning. - Unknown

Canada is a balloon-puncturing country. You are not really allowed to be an icon unless you also make an idiot of yourself. - Margaret Atwood

If you're skinny and you can't play hockey in Canada, you aren't left with a lot of options. I was left with running. - Malcolm Gladwell

Let me put it this way. Canada is not so much a country as a holding tank filled with the disgruntled progeny of defeated peoples. - Mordecai Richler

The best way to meet a woman is in an emergency situation - if you're in a shipwreck, or you find yourself behind enemy lines, or in a flood. - Mark Helprin