Bridge Slide

Ice Cream: What I do when scared - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Safety doesn't happen by accident. - Unknown

In Seine: Those who jump off a Paris bridge - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

My alone time is for everyone's safety. - Unknown

Care shouldn't start in the emergency room. - James Douglas

Safety is a cheap and effective insurance policy. - Unknown

If I melt dry ice, can I swim without getting wet? - Steven Wright

She tells enough white lies to ice a wedding cake. - Margot Asquith

Never invest emergency savings in the stock market. - Suze Orman

Obedience is the mother of success and is wedded to safety. - Aeschylus

My wife made me join a bridge club. I jump off next Tuesday. - Rodney Dangerfield

I don't jog. It makes the ice jump right out of my glass. - David Lee Roth

The trouble with jogging is that the ice falls out of your glass. - Martin Mull

The best car safety device is a rear-view mirror with a cop in it. - Dudley Moore

Your own safety is at stake when your neighbor's house is in flames. - Horace

The hardest thing in life is to know which bridge to cross and which to burn. - David Russell

Always give them the old fire, even when you feel like a squashed cake of ice. - Ethel Merman

There is nothing so strong or safe in an emergency of life as the simple truth. - Charles Dickens

I don't have lungs anymore. Just two spare bags that flew in under a bridge one day. - Dylan Moran

I like ice hockey. No one is ever going to ask me to write about that as a metaphor for life. - Steven Pinker

If you're not paying for it through the health plan, you pay for it in the emergency room. - David Lehman

In any given moment we have two options: to step forward into growth or step back into safety. - Abraham Maslow

Politicians are the same all over. They promise to build a bridge even where there is no river. - Nikita Khrushchev

We all get the same amount of ice. The rich get it in the summer. The poor get it in the winter. - Bat Masterson

Growing up, I'd just be at home, playing tennis, spending my allowance on an ice-cream truck. - Venus Williams

One of the tests of leadership is the ability to recognize a problem before it becomes an emergency. - Arnold H. Glasow

My husband is so good at home repairs that they have a special VIP area for him in the emergency room. - Unknown

Individuality is either the mark of genius or the reverse. Mediocrity finds safety in standardization. - Frederick Crane

To say I'm an overrated troll, when you have never even seen me guard a bridge, is patently unfair. - Tina Fey

I believe Ronald Reagan can make this country what it once was... a large Arctic region covered with ice. - Robin Williams

Faith is a fine invention
When Gentlemen can see -
But Microscopes are prudent
In an Emergency. - Emily Dickinson

All the plants in my house are dead - I shot them last night. I was teasing them by watering them with ice cubes. - Steven Wright

Those who would give up essential liberty to purchase a little temporary safety, deserve neither liberty nor safety. - Benjamin Franklin

When I was in boy scouts, I slipped on the ice and hurt my ankle. A little old lady had to help me across the street. - Steven Wright

If this humor be the safety of our race, then it is due largely to the infusion into the American people of the Irish brain. - William Howard Taft

Faithfulness is essential to the character of a friend: without this there can be no safety in intimacy with and confidence in him. - Samuel Hopkins

Everyone needs a coach. It doesn't matter whether you're a basketball player, a tennis player, a gymnast or a bridge player. - Bill Gates

I worked in a health food store once. A guy came in and asked me, "If I melt dry ice, can I take a bath without getting wet?" - Steven Wright

My advice to you is not to inquire why or whither, but just enjoy your ice cream while it's on your plate - that's my philosophy. - Thornton Wilder

Passover and Easter are the only Jewish and Christian holidays that move in sync, like the ice skating pairs we saw during the winter Olympics. - Marvin Olasky