#1 humor site on the 'net

Bird Smoker

The dangers of second hand smoke for animals

Bird Smoker thanks to Karen Moore

Study reveals new addiction to cigarette smoke

QuotaBills
The early bird catches the worm. - English Proverb

I want to paint the way a bird sings. - Claude Monet

Time is an illusion. Lunchtime doubly so. - Douglas Adams

A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush. - English Proverb

Goose: A bird that supplies quills for writing - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Smoking means always having to say you're sorry. - Tom Ferguson

If you smoke after sex you're doing it too fast. - Woody Allen

Intelligence without ambition is a bird without wings. - Salvador Dali

I'm suffering a little bit from smoke exhilaration. - Archie Bunker

Everybody has an addiction, mine happens to be success. - Drake

Losing an illusion makes you wiser than finding a truth. - Ludwig Borne

Leave off all thin potations and addict thyself to sack. - William Shakespeare

If I have one addiction in life, it's probably food. - Liam Hemsworth

Lawyers spend a great deal of their time shoveling smoke. - Oliver Wendell Holmes, Jr.

Love is the child of illusion and the parent of disillusion. - Miguel de Unamuno

The Bird of Hermes is my name, eating my wings to make me tame. - Kohta Hirano

Illusion is the dust the devil throws in the eyes of the foolish. - Minna Antrim

The Wright Brothers flew through the smoke screen of impossibility. - Dorothea Brande

Keep a green tree in your heart and perhaps a singing bird will come. - Chinese Proverb

Never say never because limits, like fears, are often just an illusion. - Michael Jordan

I phoned my Dad to tell him I had stopped smoking. He called me a quitter. - Steven Pearl

I planted some bird seed. A bird came up. Now I don't know what to feed it. - Steven Wright

The bird, the bee, the running child are all the same to the sliding glass door. - Demetri Martin

It has been my rule never to smoke when asleep, and never to refrain when awake. - Mark Twain

I know of only one bird (the parrot) that talks; and it can't fly very high. - Wilbur Wright

Like the cosmetics industry, the securities business is engaged in selling illusion. - Paul Samuelson

Hold fast to dreams, for if dreams die, life is a broken-winged bird that cannot fly. - Lanston Hughes

We live in a fantasy world, a world of illusion. The great task in life is to find reality. - Irish Murdoch

My husband, Fang, is so dumb I once said, "There's a dead bird." He looked up. - Phyllis Diller

Smoking kills. And if you're killed, you've lost a very important part of your life. - Brooke Shields

I'd rather learn from one bird how to sing than to teach ten thousand stars how not to dance. - e e cummings

The illusion that the times that were are better than those that are has probably pervaded all ages. - Horace Greeley

Giving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I know because I've done it thousands of times. - Mark Twain

I think we consider too much the good luck of the early bird and not enough the bad luck of the early worm. - Franklin D Roosevelt

Just as the bird sings or the butterfly soars, because it is his natural characteristic, so the artist works. - Alma Gluck

Busyness functions like an addiction. When you stop, you have to face your thoughts, which terrifies most of us. - Thibaut

If you resolve to give up smoking, drinking and loving, you don't actually live longer; it just seems longer. - Clement Freud

Too many young folk have an addiction to superficial things and not enough conviction for substantial things like justice, truth and love. - Cornel West

I remain convinced that obstinate addiction to ordinary language in our private thoughts is one of the main obstacles to progress in philosophy. - Bertrand Russell

Like a prisoner awaiting his release, like a schoolboy when the end of term is near, like a migrant bird ready to fly south... I long to be gone. - Malcolm Muggeridge


Braided Horse Tail

Owl Glove

Far North Cable Guys

Openish Hours

Lead Sled Dog

Pet Food Tester

Gold Bar Carrot Cake

Looking For A Mate

Food For Thought

Kanye Twitty

Skull Tentacles

Ukrainian Cattle Car

CreepEye

Canadian Whiskey

Winter Tree

WrenchWare

Dog Sled

Winter Ready

Bread Dress

Bear With Me

Open-air schools in The Netherlands

Ghost Food

Toothpaste Holder

Two Face