#1 humor site on the 'net

Bird Scarecrow

Do barn swallows give a hoot?

Bird Scarecrow thanks to Kyla Harris

House and owl security

QuotaBills
A married man is a caged bird. - Spanish Proverb

The early bird catches the worm. - English Proverb

Birds of a feather flock together. - English Proverb

I want to paint the way a bird sings. - Claude Monet

A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush. - English Proverb

The littlest birds sing the prettiest songs. - Tanyas

The shell must break before the bird can fly. - Unknown

Birds born in a cage think flying is an illness. - Alejandro Jodorowsky

The bird a nest, the spider a web, man friendship. - William Blake

No bird soars too high if he soars with his own wings. - William Blake

Intelligence without ambition is a bird without wings. - Salvador Dali

The early bird gets the worm. The early worm gets eaten. - Norman Augustine

The bird who dares to fall is the bird who learns to fly. - Unknown

I never wanted to weigh more heavily on a man than a bird. - Coco Chanel

The early bird catches the worm, eats more, and dies sooner. - Czech Proverb

Egg: 1. A day's work for a hen; 2. A bird's hometown. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The Bird of Hermes is my name, eating my wings to make me tame. - Kohta Hirano

If one cannot catch the bird of paradise, better take a wet hen. - Nikita Krushchev

A bird in the hand is a certainty, but a bird in the bush may sing. - Bret Harte

Faith is the bird that feels the light when the dawn is still dark. - Rabindranath Tagore

In software systems it is often the early bird that makes the worm. - Alan Perlis

The bird of paradise alights only upon the hand that does not grasp. - John Berry

Keep a green tree in your heart and perhaps a singing bird will come. - Chinese Proverb

The early bird would never catch the worm if the dumb worm slept late. - Milton Berle

In order to see birds it is necessary to become a part of the silence. - Robert Lynd

may my heart always be open to little birds who are the secrets of living - e e cummings

Though what bird in the best of circumstances does not look a little stricken? - Lorrie Moore

I planted some bird seed. A bird came up. Now I don't know what to feed it. - Steven Wright

The structure of a play is always the story of how the birds come home to roost. - Arthur Miller

The bird, the bee, the running child are all the same to the sliding glass door. - Demetri Martin

I know of only one bird (the parrot) that talks; and it can't fly very high. - Wilbur Wright

I spent a lot of my money on booze, birds and fast cars... the rest I squandered. - George Best

A bird doesn't sing because it has an answer; it sings because it has a song. - Lou Holtz

Birds with broken wings walking on the ground were once flying high up in the sky. - Mehmet M Ildan

It's just a job. Grass grows, birds fly, waves pound the sand. I beat people up. - Muhammad Ali

Birds find shelter during the rain, but eagles avoid rain by flying above the clouds. - Abdul Kalam

I am no bird; and no net ensnares me; I am a free human being with an independent will. - Charlotte Bronte

My husband, Fang, is so dumb I once said, "There's a dead bird." He looked up. - Phyllis Diller

Whether you wind up with a nest egg or a goose egg depends on the kind of chick you married. - Unknown

Be grateful for luck. Pay the thunder no mind. Listen to the birds. And don't hate nobody. - Eubie Blake

Love is not only the story of butterflies or birds; it is also the story of jackals and hounds. - M.F. Moonzajer

I'd rather learn from one bird how to sing than to teach ten thousand stars how not to dance. - e e cummings

Learn to adapt like a bird. We can only dream of flying, but the bird has already grown her wings. - Debasish Mridha

If you turn the imagination loose like a hunting dog, it will often return with the bird in its mouth. - William Maxwell

We could not understand that there was anything about a bird that could not be built on a larger scale. - Orville Wright

What a kid I got, I told him about the birds and the bees and he told me about the butcher and my wife. - Rodney Dangerfield

I think we consider too much the good luck of the early bird and not enough the bad luck of the early worm. - Franklin D Roosevelt

I keep looking for one more teacher, only to find that fish learn from the water and birds learn from the sky. - Mark Nepo

Marriage is like a cage; one sees the birds outside desperate to get in, and those inside desperate to get out. - Ogden Nash

Use what talents you possess; the woods would be very silent if no birds sang there except those that sang best. - Henry Van Dyke

One reason why birds and horses are not unhappy is because they are not trying to impress other birds and horses. - Dale Carnegie

Success is full of promise till a man gets it; and then it is a last year's nest from which the birds have flown. - Henry Ward Beecher

The reason birds can fly and we can't is simply because they have perfect faith, for to have faith is to have wings. - J.M. Barrie

You can't be suspicious of a tree, or accuse a bird or a squirrel of subversion or challenge the ideology of a violet. - Hal Borland

A perfect summer day is when the sun is shining, the breeze is blowing, the birds are singing, and the lawn mower is broken. - James Dent

You are Mr. Owl. I am Ms. Hummingbird. We may come from different species but as long as you're a bird, I'm a bird too. - Glad Munaiseche

You can not prevent the birds of sorrow from flying over your head, but you can prevent them from building a nest in your hair. - Chinese Proverb

It's a good thing we have gravity or else when birds died they'd just stay right up there. Hunters would be all confused. - Steven Wright

The moment a little boy is concerned with which is a jay and which is a sparrow, he can no longer see the birds or hear them sing. - Eric Berne

A male frigate bird blows up a wild red pouch on his neck. He can keep it puffed up for hours. It is his way of impressing the girls. - Julie Murphy

The English eat all sorts of birds - pigeons, ducks, sparrows - but if you tell them you eat puffin, you might as well come from Mars. - Bjork

If I were a flower,
humming bird would be my favourite bee
And If I were blind,
the light of darkness I'd love to see - Munia Khan

There is nothing in which the birds differ more from man than the way in which they can build and yet leave a landscape as it was before. - Robert Lynd

Join voices, all ye living souls: ye birds,
That singing up to heaven-gate ascend,
Bear on your wings and in your notes his praise. - John Milton

Like a prisoner awaiting his release, like a schoolboy when the end of term is near, like a migrant bird ready to fly south... I long to be gone. - Malcolm Muggeridge


Awning Truck Advertising

Harley Load

Face To Face

Who Needs Physics?

Benched Puppies

Water Relief

Shot Glasses

Men in Denim

Chocolate Couch

Ant Attack

Extreme Pressure Cooker

Just Thinking

Nothing Wrong Picture

Lipstick Dog

Hair Strengthener

Whale Photobomb

World Peas

Hide and Seek

Hoodie Onesy

Going Around In Circles

Whiskey Jig

Redneck Mercedes

Hala Fruit

Hydro Water Power