#1 humor site on the 'net

Big Hands Baby

Growing up to his full potential a little too early

Big Hands Baby thanks to Heather Pulfer

Little Johnny was born a natural comedian

QuotaBills
Raising kids is a walk in the park. Jurassic Park. - Unknown

A rich child often sits in a poor mother's lap. - Danish Proverb

A happy childhood has spoiled many a promising life. - Robertson Davies

For when a child is born the mother also is born again. - Gilbert Parker

Love is the child of illusion and the parent of disillusion. - Miguel de Unamuno

I'm contributing to the, waddya call, on the loosincy of a child. - Archie Bunker

Raising kids make most people, including me, grow up at least a little. - Madonna

You can't wait for inspiration. You have to go after it with a club. - Jack London

If we don't stand up for children, then we don't stand for much. - Marian W. Edelman

Joy Of Motherhood: What a woman experiences when all the kids are in bed - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

As a child, I was more afraid of tetanus shots than, for example, Dracula. - Dave Barry

We have to make our inspiration first before our inspiration can build us. - Sanjive K Sharma

A characteristic of the normal child is he doesn't act that way very often. - Unknown

Mothers hold their children's hands for a short while, but their hearts forever. - Unknown

Children are a great comfort in your old age, and they help you reach it faster, too. - Lionel Kauffman

My wife and I have a tradition of popcorn and videos with our kids on Friday evenings. - Ozwald Boateng

As a child, I always chose a false nose and some face paint and a wig for my birthday. - Ashley Jensen

Free will is an illusion. People always choose the perceived path of greatest pleasure. - Scott Adams

I learn things from my kids constantly. Most of their knowledge comes from Snapple caps. - Jimmy Kimmel

A mother's love for her child is like nothing else in the world. It knows no law, no pity. - Agatha Christie

I am the indoctrinated child of two lapsed Irish Catholics. Which is to say: I am not religious. - Meghan O'Rourke

Mothers are fonder than fathers of their children because they are more certain they are their own. - Aristotle

Children are unpredictable. You never know what inconsistency they're going to catch you in next. - Franklin P. Jones

Mid-life crisis is that moment when you realize your children and your clothes are about the same age. - William D Tammeus

Animals are like little children a bit. They're simple. They don't have politics driving them. - Annabelle Sabloff

All kids are trouble, Edith. And I don't wanna spend my reclining years trying to raise another one. - Archie Bunker

Every boy needs a role model that he can be proud of and talk about to the other kids in the playground. - Athol Fugard

The men who have furnished me with my greatest inspiration have not been men of wealth, but men of deeds. - James C Penney

Cleaning your house while your kids are still growing is like shovelling the walk before it stops snowing. - Phyllis Diller

The legacy I want to leave is a child-care system that says no kid is going to be left alone or left unsafe. - Marian Wright Edelman

Here lies my past.
Good-bye I have kissed it;
Thank you, kids.
I wouldn’t have missed it. - Ogden Nash

A nation that does not stand for its children does not stand for anything and will not stand tall in the future. - Marian W Edelman

Play is a vital learning medium for a child. In a sense play is his work. And he discovers knowledge for himself. - Raymond Moore

When your children are teenagers, it's important to have a dog so that someone in the house is happy to see you. - Nora Ephron

You can be childlike without being childish. A child always wants to have fun. Ask yourself, 'Am I having fun?' - Christopher Meloni

It's not easy to juggle a pregnant wife and a troubled child, but somehow I managed to squeeze in eight hours of TV a day. - Homer Simpson

Grandparent: 1. One who knows that spanking is unnecessary; 2. The simplest toy, one which even the youngest child can operate. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

There's nothing more contagious than the laughter of young children; it doesn't even have to matter what they're laughing about. - Criss Jami

In a big family the first child is kind of like the first pancake. If it's not perfect, that's okay, there are a lot more coming along. - Antonin Scalia

I've seen whales calving in the waters off Maui, and I've watched my children being born. But music is the most beautiful thing of all. - Steven Tyler


How To Float

Redneck Tank Top

Grasping Shirt

Detroit Counterfeit Bill

Hazardous Delivery

Log Out - Here It Comes!

Search and Rescue - Dry Run

Staff Teeth

Media Bondage

How Cumulus Clouds Are Formed

Sports Hernias

Low Expectation Autographs

The Moist Wet Territories

Cat Doormat

Redneck Foosball

Shining Stars

2021 Hooters Owl and Birds of Prey Calendars

Bach Flip

Apathy Mountain

My Toaster Is Broken

Solemate

Double Vision

Please Help My Car

Adultery