QuotaBillsPayday came and with it beer. - Rudyard Kipling
I like a wine that fights back. - John Steed
Wine and children speak the truth. - Greek Proverb
Adventure is the champagne of life. - G K Chesterton
When the wine is in, the wit is out. - English Proverb
Absinthe makes the heart grow fonder. - Addison Mizner
We only serve fine wine. Did you bring any? - Unknown
I'm Hybrid. I run on chocolate and wine. - Unknown
Inflation: everyone's illusion of wealth - Unknown
Draft Dodger: Someone who avoids beer on tap. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor. - George Carlin
Talking to you is like casting pearls into wine. - Archie Bunker
As a cure for worrying, work is better than whiskey. - Ralph Waldo Emerson
There was a sound in their voices which suggested rum. - Robert Louis Sevenson
If God forbade drinking, would He have made wine so good? - Cardinal Richelieu
Herb is the healing of a nation, alcohol is the destruction. - Bob Marley
Give me a woman who loves beer and I will conquer the world. - Wilhelm II
If we choose, we can live in a world of comforting illusion. - Noam Chomsky
I'm only a beer teetotaller, not a champagne teetotaller. - George Bernard Shaw
I never drank anything stronger than beer before I was twelve. - WC Fields
Illusion is the dust the devil throws in the eyes of the foolish. - Minna Antrim
Ah, good ol' trustworthy beer. My love for you will never die. - Homer Simpson
I have taken more out of alcohol than alcohol has taken out of me. - Winston Churchill
Give me a woman who truly loves beer and I will conquer the world. - Kaiser Willhelm II
Too much of anything is bad. Too much of good whisky is barely enough. - Mark Twain
Our separation from each other is an optical illusion of consciousness. - Albert Einstein
A bottle of wine contains more philosophy than all the books in the world. - Louis Pasteur
In 1969 I gave up women and alcohol - it was the worst 20 minutes of my life. - George Best
Logic, like whiskey, loses its beneficial effect when taken in too large quantities. - Lord Dunsany
Like the cosmetics industry, the securities business is engaged in selling illusion. - Paul Samuelson
The greatest obstacle to discovery is not ignorance - it is the illusion of knowledge. - Daniel J. Boorstin
Kidney: 1. Midpoint of a child's leg; 2. An organ used to convert beer into urine. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
New York champagne - that's a phony label. They don't grow raisins in New York. - Archie Bunker
You call this a party? The beer is warm, the women cold and I'm hot under the collar. - Groucho Marx
Why is it that everybody's suing the tobacco companies and not the alcohol companies? - Donald Trump
When Jack Benny has a party, you not only bring your own scotch, you bring your own rocks. - George Burns
When a man who is drinking neat gin starts talking about his mother he is past all argument. - C.S. Forester
I don't drink these days. I am allergic to alcohol and narcotics. I break out in handcuffs. - Robert Downey Jr.
Always carry a flagon of whiskey in case of snakebite and furthermore always carry a small snake. - WC Fields
I'm making wine at home, but I'm making it out of raisins so it will be aged automatically. - Steven Wright
The illusion that the times that were are better than those that are has probably pervaded all ages. - Horace Greeley
When the clergyman's daughter
Drinks nothing but water
She's certain to finish on gin. - Rudyard Kipling
If you have to choose between drinking wine every day or being skinny, which would you choose: Red or White? - Unknown
Ninety percent I'll spend on good times, women and Irish Whiskey. The other ten percent I'll probably waste. - Tug McGraw
Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day. - George Carlin
It was so quiet, a reservation kind of quiet, where you can hear somebody drinking whiskey on the rocks three miles away. - Sherman Alexie
A fruit is a vegetable with looks and money. Plus, if you let fruit rot, it turns into wine; something Brussels Sprouts never do. - P.J. O'Rourke
A computer lets you make more mistakes faster than any invention in human history - with the possible exceptions of handguns and tequila. - Mitch Ratcliffe
Alcohol is not in my vodkabulary. However, I looked it up on whiskeypedia and learned if you drink too much of it, it's likely tequilya. - Unknown
When I have an idea, I turn down the flame, as if it were a little alcohol stove, as low as it will go. Then it explodes and that is my idea. - Ernest Hemingway