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Aussie Bar Rules

Australians aren't always Down Under

Aussie Bar Rules thanks to Eddy Joyce, Armadale, West Australia

Bartending signs for male and female customers in Australia

QuotaBills
Payday came and with it beer. - Rudyard Kipling

I like a wine that fights back. - John Steed

Gin was mother's milk to her. - George Bernard Shaw

Wine is my favorite 4 letter word. - Unknown

Candy is dandy but liquor is quicker. - Ogden Nash

Does wine count as a serving of fruit? - Joe-kster

Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder. - Unknown

The rules are written by the bureaucraps. - Archie Bunker

You can never buy beer, you just rent it. - Archie Bunker

Life is too short to drink the house wine. - Helen Thomas

One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor. - George Carlin

Many people set rules to keep from making decisions. - Mike Krzyzewski

As a cure for worrying, work is better than whiskey. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

There was a sound in their voices which suggested rum. - Robert Louis Sevenson

It was 2:00 p.m., too early for wine but not for chocolate. - Andrea Hurst

What two ideas are more inseparable than Beer and Britannia? - Sydney Smith

Herb is the healing of a nation, alcohol is the destruction. - Bob Marley

I never drank anything stronger than beer before I was twelve. - WC Fields

War has rules, mud wrestling has rules - politics has no rules. - Ross Perot

Memorial services are the cocktail parties of the geriatric set. - Ralph Richardson

You ought to get out of those wet clothes and into a dry martini. - Mae West

Computers are like Old Testament gods; lots of rules and no mercy. - Joseph Cambell

Rules are made for people who aren't willing to make up their own. - Chuck Yeager

Toss out the rules; don't think outside the box, throw the box away. - Nido Qubein

You can lead a horse to water but I'd rather ride it to the liquor store. - Wayne Nowazek

In wine there is wisdom, in beer there is freedom, in water there is bacteria. - Ben Franklin

If one glass of wine is good for you, just imagine what a whole bottle could do! - Unknown

Music is the only thing I've ever known that doesn't have any rules at all. - Josh Homme

When New Zealanders emigrate to Australia, it raises the average IQ of both countries. - Robert Muldoon

Kidney: 1. Midpoint of a child's leg; 2. An organ used to convert beer into urine. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I love to sing, and I love to drink scotch. Most people would rather hear me drink scotch. - George Burns

The only time I ever enjoyed ironing was the day I accidentally got gin in the steam iron. - Phyllis Diller

I exercise extreme self control. I never drink anything stronger than gin before breakfast. - WC Fields

When a man who is drinking neat gin starts talking about his mother he is past all argument. - C.S. Forester

The game is played not to protect the rules; rather, the rules are made to protect the game. - Ravi Zacharias

I think it's an absolute disaster that Australia, the government, allowed kangaroo culling. - Steve Irwin

Don't worry about the world coming to an end today. It's already tomorrow in Australia. - Charles M. Schulz

I don't drink these days. I am allergic to alcohol and narcotics. I break out in handcuffs. - Robert Downey Jr.

Just as Jesus created wine from water, we humans are capable of transmuting emotion into music. - Carlos Santana

He's so full of alcohol, if you put a lighted wick in his mouth he'd burn for three days. - Groucho Marx

When the clergyman's daughter
Drinks nothing but water
She's certain to finish on gin. - Rudyard Kipling

If you have to choose between drinking wine every day or being skinny, which would you choose: Red or White? - Unknown

Milk is the drink of babies, tea the drink of women, water the drink of beasts, and wine is the drink of the gods. - John S Blackie

We have embarked upon the world's largest and longest cocktail party, and every issue imaginable is up for grabs. - Geoffrey Moore

I'd learned some things. I knew you weren't supposed to hold a good wine at the top - the paper bag falls off. - Pat Paulsen

It was so quiet, a reservation kind of quiet, where you can hear somebody drinking whiskey on the rocks three miles away. - Sherman Alexie

A fruit is a vegetable with looks and money. Plus, if you let fruit rot, it turns into wine; something Brussels Sprouts never do. - P.J. O'Rourke

Not all chemicals are bad. Without hydrogen and oxygen, for example, there would be no way to make water, a vital ingredient in beer. - Dave Barry

The rules of clockwork might apply to familiar objects such as snooker balls, but when it comes to atoms, the rules are those of roulette. - Paul Davies

The simple act of opening a bottle of wine has brought more happiness to the human race than all the collective governments in the history of earth. - Jim Harrison


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