Wurst Humour

German headshrinker named Sigmund Fruit - Archie Bunker

Some German words are so long that they have perspective. - Mark Twain

Lawsuit: a machine you go into as a pig and come out of as a sausage. - Ambrose Bierce

I imagine hell like this: Italian punctuality, German humour and English wine. - Peter Ustinov

Litigation: A machine which you go into as a pig and come out of as a sausage. - Ambrose Bierce

45 caliber German Shmowzer - a 38 caliber German Floogle with a telephonic site - Archie Bunker

My husband's German. Every night I get dressed up as Poland and he invades me. - Bette Midler

To God I speak Spanish, to women Italian, to men French, and to my horse - German. - Emperor Charles V

German is the most extravagantly ugly language - it sounds like someone using a sick bag on a 747. - Willy Rushton

Whatever music sounds like, I am glad to say that it does not sound in the smallest degree like German. - Oscar Wilde

The reason there are so many tree-lined boulevards in Paris is so the German army can march in the shade. - George S Patton