Where Is He?

Never let the tail wag the dog. - Unknown

Zit: Command given to a spotted dog - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

A dog has the soul of a philosopher. - Plato

Lassitude: A heroic dog with attitude - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I am I because my little dog knows me. - Gertrude Stein

A dog in desperation will leap over a wall. - Unknown

You can't teach a young dog old tricks. - Warren Buffett

Don't think to hunt two hares with one dog. - Benjamin Franklin

Pants: Something a dog does and a man steps into - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I spilled spot remover on my dog. Now he's gone. - Steven Wright

Be on your guard against a silent dog and still water. - Latin Proverb

The scalded dog fears hot water, and afterwards, cold. - Italian Proverb

The average dog is a nicer person than the average person. - Andy Rooney

Hot Dog: The only animal that feeds the hand that bites it - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

My wife's such a bad cook, the dog begs for Alka-Seltzer. - Rodney Dangerfield

Elixir: What a dog does to his owner when she gives him a bone - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

When a man's best friend is his dog, that dog has a problem. - Edward Abbey

Dogs are getting bigger, according to a leading dog manufacturer. - Leo Rosten

Only a biker knows why a dog sticks his head out of a car window. - Unknown

No man should live where he can hear his neighbor's dog bark. - Nathaniel Macon

Happiness is coming home and knowing your dog is there to greet you. - Unknown

To his dog, every man is Napoleon; hence the constant popularity of dogs. - Aldous Huxley

A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than you love yourself. - Josh Billings

Observe your dog: if he's fat, then you're not getting enough exercise. - Evan Esar

Every boy should have two things: a dog and a mother willing to let him have one. - Unknown

I am obsessed with Costco. I love the salmon and rotisserie chicken, the dog beds. - Kris Jenner

Life is like a dogsled team. If you ain't the lead dog, the scenery never changes. - Lewis Grizzard

Heaven goes by favor. If it went by merit, you would stay out and your dog would go in. - Mark Twain

I love working in Canada. The ovation is great. It makes me feel like I'm the top dog. - Owen Hart

A dog teaches a boy fidelity, perseverance, and to turn around three times before lying down. - Robert Benchley

For us in Russia, communism is a dead dog, while, for many people in the West, it is still a living lion. - Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn

It's tough to stay married. My wife kisses the dog on the lips, yet she won't drink from my glass! - Rodney Dangerfield

If you get to thinkin' you're a person of some influence, try orderin' somebody else's dog around. - Unknown

Already, companies that speak in the language of the pitch, the dog-and-pony show, are no longer speaking to anyone. - Unknown

We've begun to long for the pitter-patter of little feet, so we bought a dog. It's cheaper and you get more feet. - Rita Rudner

An actor is never so great as when he reminds you of an animal - falling like a cat, lying like a dog, moving like a fox. - Francois Truffaut

My girlfriend's dog died. So I got her an identical one. She was livid; 'What am I going to do with two dead dogs?' - Gary Delaney

If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you. This is the principal difference between a dog and a man. - Mark Twain

I put contact lenses in my dog's eyes. They had little pictures of cats on them. Then I took one out and he ran around in circles. - Steven Wright

If animals could speak, the dog would be a blundering outspoken fellow; but the cat would have the rare grace of never saying a word too much. - Mark Twain