#1 humor site on the 'net

Velociraptor Defined

Where Velocity first got its equation

Velociraptor Defined thanks to Dick Brighton, North Vancouver, B.C.

Dinosaur math for a Redneck Engineer

d = vt + (1/2)at^2

QuotaBills
Engineering with fabric. - Jean Muir

The engineering is secondary to the vision. - Cynthia Ozick

Architecture begins where engineering ends. - Walter Gropius

Death and taxes are unsolved engineering problems. - Romana Machado

If history repeats itself, I am so getting a dinosaur! - Unknown

Politics is for the present, but an equation is for eternity. - Albert Einstein

We all have a dinosaur deep within us just trying to get out. - Colin Mochrie

I don't think my generation got into this dinosaur thing. - Walter Cronkite

Most of the dinosaur specimens we find represent subadult sizes. - Jack Horner

I am a great fan of science, but I cannot do a quadratic equation. - Terry Pratchett

Britain's most useful role is somewhere between bee and dinosaur. - Harold MacMillan

The reality is you either step into the future, or you become a dinosaur. - M Shadows

The dinosaurs became extinct because they didn't have a space program. - Larry Niven

Someone told me that each equation I included in the book would halve the sales. - Stephen Hawking

To be safe at the expense of the liberty of other people is a difficult equation. - Madeleine Albright

I've spent three hours hanging upside down while fighting off dinosaur attacks. - Jason O'Mara

In one equation you can solve all the puzzles of life. It is the equation of giving. - Amit Ray

Scientists discover the world that exists; engineers create the world that never was. - Theodore von Karman

Nothing changes the gender equation more significantly than women's economic freedom. - Gloria Steinem

Genetic Engineering: A recent attempt to formalize what farmers have been doing all along. - Unknown

I want flowers, I don't want to text. What does that make me? What kind of dinosaur am I? - Jennifer Garner

Ronald Reagan knew who he was. Barack Obama is still working through that equation politically. - Joe Scarborough

I do not think there is any silver bullet to solving the technology side of the security equation. - John W. Thompson

Learning by doing, peer-to-peer teaching, and computer simulation are all part of the same equation. - Nicholas Negroponte

One has to look out for engineers - they begin with sewing machines and end up with the atomic bomb. - Marcel Pagnol

At the end of the day if you want to entertain people, you've got to take your ego out of the equation. - Paul Feig

There's no environment I can think of that would have remained constant enough to preserve dinosaur DNA. - Hendrik Poinar

We women know how to take care of everybody so well. But the one person we have written out of the equation is us. - Suze Orman

A dinosaur out of context is like a character without a story. Worse than that, the character suffers from amnesia. - Jack Horner

The Swedish engineer who invented the zip fastener made a greater intellectual leap than many scientists do in a lifetime. - Martin Rees

The dinosaur's eloquent lesson is that if some bigness is good, an overabundance of bigness is not necessarily better. - Eric Johnston

Many training programs and often schools focus on just a skill or a kind of work competency. That's only half the equation. - Gerald Chertavian

Risk and failure is a part of our equation, and if you are seeing too little failure, you are actually probably not taking enough risks. - Peter Barris

Imagining what a character will do in a given situation - it's like an equation, and working it out is a marathon rather than a sprint. - Callum Turner

When a train goes through a tunnel and it gets dark, you don't throw away the ticket and jump off. You sit still and trust the engineer. - Corrie Ten Boom

Faith is not logical. But it isn't illogical either. Faith is theological. It does not ignore reality; it just adds God into the equation. - Mark Batterson

They submitted bills, and we paid them. Then we checked the engineering reports and found out that we had paid them far more than we owed them. - Donald Trump

To the optimist, the glass is half-full. To the pessimist, the glass is half-empty. To the engineer, the glass is twice as big as it needs to be. - Unknown

Whenever you are embarrassed, just remember that in 1999 NASA destroyed a $655 Million project because the engineers mistook kilograms and pounds. - Unknown

Charity is a very personal equation, like we say charity begins at home. It starts with your immediate help in the house: the people who work for you. - Malaika A. Khan


Closing Time

Wine Glass Lanyard

Awning Truck Advertising

Plugged In

Org Chart - Simplified Version

Extreme Value

Instant Acrophobia

How To Hire Engineers

Business School Basics

Waterwheel Rotisserie

Elephant Bus

Promote Yourself

Time Machine

Redneck Engagement Ring

Forever Clean Toilet

Edible Clock

Up-Set & Hungry Trucks

Bear Pinata

Swim Vacation

What Are Your Skills?

Portable Barber Shop

Snail Trail

Anger Release Machine

Pun-e Signs