Tree Stump Table

My family tree could use some pruning. - Unknown

Trees often transplanted seldom prosper. - Flemish Proverb

What kind of man gives cigarettes to trees? - Robin Williams

Trees cause more pollution than automobiles do. - Ronald Reagan

A sure cure for seasickness is to sit under a tree. - Spike Milligan

If you hate where you are, move - you are not a tree. - Unknown

The best cure for sea sickness, is to sit under a tree. - Spike Milligan

Native ability without education is like a tree without fruit. - Aristippus

I'd rather have roses on my table than diamonds on my neck. - Emma Goldman

Keep a green tree in your heart and perhaps a singing bird will come. - Chinese Proverb

If a tree falls in the forest and no one hears, does it make a sound? - Unknown

The colder the X-Ray table, the more of your body is required to be on it. - Steven Wright

Thirteen at a table is unlucky only when the hostess has only twelve chops. - Groucho Marx

The best time to plant a tree was 20 years ago. The second best time is now. - Chinese Proverb

I went to a haunted house, looked under the kitchen table, and found spirit gum. - Steven Wright

On the Continent people have good food; in England people have good table manners. - George Mikes

It will never rain roses. When we want to have more roses, we must plant more trees. - George Eliot

Everyone wants to eat at the government's table, but nobody wants to do the dishes. - Werner Finck

The true meaning of life is to plant trees, under whose shade you do not expect to sit. - Nelson Henderson

Suburbia is where the developer bulldozes out the trees, then names the streets after them. - Bill Vaughan

A half finished shawl left on the coffee table isn't a mess; it's an object of art. - Stephanie Pearl-McPhee

Insight comes, more often than not, from looking at what's been on the table all along. - David McCullough

The tree of liberty must be refreshed from time to time with the blood of patriots and tyrants. - Thomas Jefferson

If you reveal your secrets to the wind, don't blame the wind for revealing them to the trees. - Unknown

Why pay money to have your family tree traced; go into politics and your opponents will do it for you. - Unknown

It is not hard to compose, but what is fabulously hard is to leave the superfluous notes under the table. - Johannes Brahms

My wife is on a diet. Coconuts and bananas. She hasn't lost any weight, but she can sure climb a tree. - Henny Youngman

May I never be drunk enough to try to play a foosball table alone like that dude over there who actually is. - Dr. Okay Times

Climb the mountains and get their good tidings. Nature's peace will flow into you as sunshine flows into trees. - John Muir

Character is like a tree and reputation like a shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing. - Abraham Lincoln

Talent is cheaper than table salt. What separates the talented individual from the successful one is a lot of hard work. - Stephen King

You can't be suspicious of a tree, or accuse a bird or a squirrel of subversion or challenge the ideology of a violet. - Hal Borland

As the poet said, "Only God can make a tree" - probably because it's so hard to figure out how to get the bark on. - Woody Allen

I glanced out the window at the signs of spring. The sky was almost blue, the trees were almost budding, the sun was almost bright. - Millard Kaufman

On the top of the Crumpetty Tree
The Quangle Wangle sat,
But his face you could not see,
On account of his Beaver Hat. - Edward Lear

Wolves directly affect the entire ecosystem, not just moose populations, their main prey, because less moose equals more tree growth. - Rolf Peterson

Only when the last tree has withered, and the last fish caught, and the last river been poisoned, will we realize we cannot eat money. - Cree Proverb

Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid. - Albert Einstein

I think that I shall never see
A billboard lovely as a tree;
Perhaps, unless the billboards fall,
I'll never see a tree at all. - Ogden Nash

You need the kind of objectivity that makes you forget everything you've heard, clear the table, and do a factual study like a scientist would. - Steve Wozniak