Today's Bathroom Reader

The computer is a moron. - Peter F Drucker

Computer viruses should count as life. - Stephen Hawking

Hollywood is like Picasso's bathroom. - Candice Bergen

You can't write poetry on the computer. - Quentin Tarantino

We don't need nukes. We have the internet. - Alice Minium

I write poems like some people sing in the bathroom. - Amit Bhatia

I am not a speed reader.
I am a speed understander. - Isaac Asimov

The kitchen. The bathroom. The yin and yang of the household. - David C. Holley

There is no reason anyone would want a computer in their home. - Ken Olson

Gutenberg made everybody a reader. Xerox makes everybody a publisher. - Marshall McLuhan

Running is an unnatural act, except from enemies and to the bathroom. - Unknown

On the keyboard of life always keep one finger on the 'escape' key. - Unknown

A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing. - Emo Philips

Getting information off the Internet is like taking a drink from a fire hydrant. - Mitchell Kapor

There are two things that Jack Bauer never does. Show mercy, and go to the bathroom. - Kiefer Sutherland

I might love my e-reader, but I'd never pass up the chance to browse real books. - Nichole Chase

Keyboard Plaque: The disgusting buildup of dirt and crud found on computer keyboards - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I almost sent you a real birthday card but thankfully my internet connection came back. - Unknown

I grew up with six brothers. That's how I learned to dance - waiting for the bathroom. - Bob Hope

Music Lover: A man, who upon hearing a soprano in the bathroom, puts his ear to the keyhole - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I don't believe in e-mail. I'm an old-fashioned girl. I prefer calling and hanging up. - Sarah Jessica Parker

With every bathroom renovation, there are three areas that I focus on: budget, function and style. - Candice Olson

At a formal dinner party, the person nearest death should always be seated closest to the bathroom. - George Carlin

I do like to read in bed, but because I have two kids I'm often forced to read in the bathroom. - Eoin Colfer

You go to your TV to turn your brain off. You go to the computer when you want to turn your brain on. - Steve Jobs

TV and the Internet are good because they keep stupid people from spending too much time out in public. - Douglas Coupland

I sleep with a light on in the bathroom so I can see where I'm at, because I wake up and have no clue. - Carrie Underwood

So I'm reading a book on my new iPad, but can't the iPad read it for me? Do I have to do everything? - Matthew Perry

I use a computer. I don't know if that qualifies me as a techie, but I'm pretty good on the computer. - Leonard Nimoy

Just as we could have rode into the sunset, along came the Internet, and it tripled the significance of the PC. - Andy Grove

People enjoy the interaction on the internet, and the feeling of belonging to a group that does something interesting. - Linus Torvalds

The protean nature of the computer is such that it can act like a machine or like a language to be shaped and exploited. - Alan Kay

My kids always perceived the bathroom as a place where you wait it out until all the groceries are unloaded from the car. - Erma Bombeck

Before you marry a person, you should first make them use a computer with slow internet service to see who they really are. - Will Ferrell

My favorite thing about the Internet is that you get to go into the private world of real creeps without having to smell them. - Penn Jillette

The Internet is the most important single development in the history of human communication since the invention of call waiting. - Dave Barry

I wish I had a nickel for every song that I've left in the bathroom, written down on a matchbox, or just totally forgotten about. - Tommy Shaw

Men who consistently leave the toilet seat up secretly want women to get up to go the bathroom in the middle of the night and fall in. - Rita Rudner

Boat Anchor: 1. Thrown out when you need it, and taken in when you don't; 2. An old computer so useless that it needs to go to sea. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

My mother was a reader, and she read to us. She read us Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde when I was six and my brother was eight. I never forgot it. - Stephen King