Tight Fit

Hollywood is like Picasso's bathroom. - Candice Bergen

A cubicle is just a padded cell without a door. - Unknown

Always go to the bathroom when you have a chance. - King George V

I would rather sleep in a bathroom than in another hotel. - Billy Wilder

I got a garage door opener. It can't close. Just open. - Steven Wright

The kitchen. The bathroom. The yin and yang of the household. - David C. Holley

I used to practice Tony speeches in my bathroom with my hairbrush. - Audra McDonald

Every bathroom in my house will ultimately have a Toto bidet in it. - Ken Marino

Running is an unnatural act, except from enemies and to the bathroom. - Unknown

It's too late to close the stable door after the horse has bolted. - French Proverb

I started singing in the bathroom. Nothing was coming out. It was ghastly. - Rod Stewart

Burst down those closet doors once and for all, and stand up and start to fight. - Harvey Milk

The bird, the bee, the running child are all the same to the sliding glass door. - Demetri Martin

Let everyone leave all the guns - British guns and Irish guns - outside the door. - Martin McGuinness

When I was younger I used to lock myself in the bathroom and read in the dry tub. - Karen Russell

If a door slams shut it means that God is pointing to an open door further on down. - Anna Delaney Peale

Imagination, of course, can open any door - turn the key and let terror walk right in. - Truman Capote

At Disneyland, you never go 'backstage' - even when you're in the bathroom. - Hideo Kojima

Some people not only expect opportunity to knock, they expect it to beat the door down. - Unknown

A true friend is the one that's coming in the door while everyone else is going out. - Dr. Phil McGraw

Hiring someone to write your autobiography is like hiring someone to take a bath for you. - Mae West

I grew up with six brothers. That's how I learned to dance - waiting for the bathroom. - Bob Hope

If the doors of perception were cleansed, everything would appear to man as it is: infinite. - William Blake

You can tell a man isn't handy when he asks the man next door how to get blood off a saw. - Milton Berle

At the door of life, by the gate of breath, there are worse things waiting for men than death. - A.C. Swinburne The Triumph Of Time

Look for opportunity. You can't wait for it to knock on the door ... You might not be home. - Jinger Heath

Basically my wife was immature. I'd be in my bath, and she'd come in and sink my boats. - Woody Allen

Castro couldn't even go to the bathroom unless the Soviet Union put the nickel in the toilet. - Richard M Nixon

For marriage to be a success, every woman and every man should have her and his own bathroom. The end. - Catherine Zeta-Jones

Happiness is something that comes into our lives through doors we don't even remember leaving open. - Rose Wilder Lane

You can spend your precious energy beating down closed doors, or you can choose the doors that open when you knock. - Unknown

When you're following your inner voice, doors tend to eventually open for you, even if they mostly slam at first. - Kelly Cutrone

The truth knocks on the door and you say, "Go away, I'm looking for the truth," and so it goes away. Puzzling. - Robert M Pirsig

I like to do things for my wife on Valentine's Day. I open the door for her when she puts laundry in the washing machine. - Milton Berle

My friend Sally is a nudist. I went to her house. The closets have no doors. The walls are covered with see-through wallpaper. - Steven Wright

Men who consistently leave the toilet seat up secretly want women to get up to go the bathroom in the middle of the night and fall in. - Rita Rudner

I worked in a health food store once. A guy came in and asked me, "If I melt dry ice, can I take a bath without getting wet?" - Steven Wright

I've got this thing for spicy stuff. Now, if you give me hot chocolate with chili pepper, a book and a bubble bath, I'm a happy girl. - Shiloh Walker

My wife was a make-up artist, and she's a total product junkie. Our bathroom is packed full of lotions and potions so I end up trying them out. - Robert Carlyle

Dogs display reluctance and wrath
If you try to give them a bath;
They bury bones in hideaways
And half the time they trot sideaways. - Ogden Nash