#1 humor site on the 'net

Shopping With Grandma

Why the kids could hardly keep up with Grandma

Shopping With Grandma thanks to Roy Taylor

Attention K-Mart shoppers: sale special on Aisle 2!

Once the new clothes were worn in, she got a used clothing discount
QuotaBills
Shopping is my cardio. - Carrie Bradshaw

These are cathedrals of shopping. - Emile Zola

Tailor Shop: Last of the big-time menders - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Grammatical Error: When Grandma screws up - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Inequality of knowledge is the key to a sale. - Neil O Gustafson

My grandmother made dying her life's work. - Hugh Leonard

Leanardo De Cappuccino: Founder, coffee shop chain - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

There is no place like home - except Grandma's. - Unknown

Crying is for plain women. Pretty women go shopping. - Oscar Wilde

A shop should be like a song of which you never tire. - Harry Gordon Selfridge

Malaria: Several shopping centers close to each other - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

People who shop in health food stores never look healthy. - Amy Sedaris

The quickest way to know a woman is to go shopping with her. - Marcelene Cox

A good thing sells itself; a bad thing advertises itself for sale. - African Saying

Grandma, thank you for being my anchor in this stormy sea of life. - Unknown

My grandmother took a bath every year, whether she was dirty or not. - Brendan Behan

A grandmother pretends she doesn't know who you are on Halloween. - Erma Bombeck

I spent seven hours in a beauty shop... and that was for the estimate. - Phyllis Diller

Whoever said money can't buy happiness didn't know where to shop. - Gertrude Stein

Someone told me that each equation I included in the book would halve the sales. - Stephen Hawking

My favourite place to eat is my grandma's kitchen. She makes a mean crab cake. - Karlie Kloss

Grandmother and grandchild never truly part, maybe in distance but never in heart. - Unknown

I'm so ugly I worked in a pet shop, and people kept asking how big I'd get. - Rodney Dangerfield

Marketers need to build digital relationships and reputation before closing a sale. - Chris Brogan

My legs are so sore from the gym that I almost couldn't walk to the donut shop. - Bill Murray

When women are mad or depressed, they eat or go shopping. Men invade another country. - Elayne Boosler

Every sale has five basic obstacles: no need, no money, no hurry, no desire, no trust. - Zig Ziglar

Whoever said money can't buy happiness simply didn't know where to go shopping. - Bo Derek

A grandmother is a little bit parent, a little bit teacher, and a little bit best friend. - Unknown

If a tie is like kissing your sister, losing is like kissing your grandmother with her teeth out. - George Brett

Grandma always made you feel she had been waiting to see you all day and now the day was complete. - Marcy DeMaree

To me, job titles don't matter. Everyone is in sales. It's the only way we stay in business. - Harvey Mackay

My grandmother was a very tough woman. She buried three husbands, and two of them were just napping. - Rita Rudner

Cigarette sales would drop to zero overnight if the warning said, "Cigarettes contain fat." - Dave Barry

Grandchildren don't make a man feel old; it's the knowledge that he's married to a grandmother. - G Norman Collie

Too often, sales reps simply regurgitate their presentations and expect to land the sale. It doesn't work. - Harvey Mackay

When one may pay out over two million dollars to presidential and Congressional campaigns, the U.S. government is virtually up for sale. - John W. Gardner

I hate smart sales clerks. I said to one, "What do you have in lingerie?" She says, "More than you'll ever have!" - Phyllis Diller

New Pasta Diet: Just walk pasta bakery without stopping. Walk pasta candy store without stopping. Walk pasta ice cream shop without stopping. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Blind dates are treacherous. You don't know who this person is. You wonder, "Should I call my grandma during coffee to get out of this?" - Alan Alda


Hyphenated Names

Indian Fish Pond

Lunch Anyone?

Wet T-Shirt Contest Winners

Giraffe Lunch

Bathroom Celebration

Tennis Ball Retriever

One

Tonsil Ring

Brew Haul-her - 12 Brewskies At A Time

Anon-y-moose

Redneck Beer Opener

Greek Monk

Dates For Everyone

Max Occupancy Rounded to 100

Group Photo

Awning Truck Advertising

Harley Load

Face To Face

Who Needs Physics?

Benched Puppies

Water Relief

Shot Glasses

Men in Denim