Scottish Haircut

Scotland is the Canada of England. - Rainn Wilson

I like my whiskey old and my women young. - Errol Flynn

Never ask the barber if you need a haircut. - Warren Buffett

Even the worst haircut eventually grows out. - Lisa Kogan

You're only as good as your last haircut. - Fran Lebowitz

When life hands you lemons, make whiskey sours. - WC Fields

What whiskey will not cure, there is no cure for. - Irish Proverb

As a cure for worrying, work is better than whiskey. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Drown in a vat of whiskey? Oh death, where is thy sting? - WC Fields

The Irish seem to have more fire about them than the Scots. - Sean Connery

I'm on a whiskey diet. I've lost three days already. - Tommy Cooper

My theory is that all of Scottish cuisine is based on a dare. - Mike Myers

If I wear too much tartan I tend to look like a Thermos flask. - Ronnie Corbett

Why don't you get a haircut? You look like a chrysanthemum. - P G Wodehouse

God invented whiskey to prevent the Irish from ruling the world. - Irish Saying

The history of Scotland is one of theology tempered by homicide. - Ivor Brown

Too much of anything is bad. Too much of good whisky is barely enough. - Mark Twain

Whiskey is by far the most popular of all remedies that won't cure a cold. - Jerry Vale

Kilt: A costume sometimes worn by Scotsmen in America and Americans in Scotland - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

As far as single payer, it works in Canada. It works incredibly well in Scotland. - Donald Trump

Logic, like whiskey, loses its beneficial effect when taken in too large quantities. - Lord Dunsany

Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys. - P.J. O'Rourke

Jameson's Irish Whiskey really does improve with age: the older I get the more I like it. - Bob Monkhouse

I have a difficult time doing an Irish accent; even now, it kind of fades slowly into Scottish. - Robin Williams

Always carry a flagon of whiskey in case of snakebite and furthermore always carry a small snake. - WC Fields

Ninety percent I'll spend on good times, women and Irish Whiskey. The other ten percent I'll probably waste. - Tug McGraw

Inflation is when you pay fifteen dollars for the ten dollar haircut you used to get for five dollars when you had hair. - Sam Ewing

You pretty much can't get away from bacon or whiskey in the South. Put a doughnut in it and you'd be good to go. - Hillary Scott

It was so quiet, a reservation kind of quiet, where you can hear somebody drinking whiskey on the rocks three miles away. - Sherman Alexie

Beauty isn't worth thinking about; what's important is your mind. You don't want a fifty-dollar haircut on a fifty-cent head. - Garrison Keillor

In those days the best painkiller was ice. It wasn't addictive, and it was particularly effective if you poured some whiskey over it. - George Burns

The great outdoors is a theme with me; a walking holiday in Scotland is perfect - Culloden and the forests of Aviemore are both favourites. - Erin O'Connor

Irish whiskey was first developed for its medicinal benefits. It's just lucky for the rest of us that the Irish are such a sickly bunch. - Unknown

We had hoped to have been bringing you Arthur the Human Chameleon, but this afternoon, he crawled across a tartan rug and died of exhaustion. - Ronnie Corbett