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A married man is a caged bird. - Spanish Proverb

Marry in haste, repent at leisure. - English Proverb

Cantaloupe: Got to get married in Church - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

A really good detective never gets married. - Raymond Chandler

In married life, three is company and two none. - Oscar Wilde

Love - a temporary insanity curable by marriage. - Ambrose Bierce

She tells enough white lies to ice a wedding cake. - Margot Asquith

The woman cries before the wedding and the man after. - Polish Proverb

Gentlemen who prefer blondes usually marry brunettes. - Unknown

I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury. - Groucho Marx

There's more to marriage than four bare legs in a bed. - English Proverb

Hand Scanner: Singles bar prowler looking for wedding rings - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Politics doesn't make strange bedfellows - marriage does. - Groucho Marx

Men are my hobby. If I ever got married, I'd have to give it up. - Mae West

Tenderness is greater proof of love than the most passionate of vows. - Marlene Dietrich

A man is often too young to marry, but a man is never too old to love. - Finnish Proverb

One should always be in love. That is the reason one should never marry. - Oscar Wilde

I believe in love and marriage, but not necessarily with the same person. - John Travolta

Marriage is a lottery, but you can't tear up your ticket if you lose. - F.M. Knowles

Marriage is really tough because you have to deal with feelings and lawyers. - Richard Pryor

Will you marry me? Do you have any money?
Answer the second question first. - Groucho Marx

Sir, it is your duty to get married. You can't be always living for pleasure. - Oscar Wilde

Only choose in marriage a woman whom you would choose as a friend if she were a man. - Joseph Joubert

Let us now set forth one of the fundamental truths about marriage: the wife is in charge. - Bill Cosby

Marriage is like putting your hand into a bag of snakes in the hope of pulling out an eel. - Leonardo da Vinci

Today couples live together until they learn to detest one another. Then they get married. - G K Chesterton

Without the will, marriage is a mockery; without the emotion, it is a drudgery. You need both. - Ravi Zacharias

The husband who wants a happy marriage should learn to keep his mouth shut and his checkbook open. - Groucho Marx

The one charm of marriage is that it makes a life of deception absolutely necessary for both parties. - Oscar Wilde

When I make a vow to God, then I would suggest to you that's even stronger than a handshake in Texas. - Rick Perry

It's tough to stay married. My wife kisses the dog on the lips, yet she won't drink from my glass! - Rodney Dangerfield

The most happy marriage I can picture or imagine to myself would be the union of a deaf man to a blind woman. - Samuel Taylor Coleridge

Always get married in the morning. That way if it doesn't work out, you haven't wasted the whole day. - Mickey Rooney

Marriage always demands the greatest understanding of the art of insincerity possible between two human beings. - Vicki Baum

Love is an ideal thing, marriage is a real thing. A confusion of the real with the ideal never goes unpunished. - Johann Wolfgang Goethe

I've never been married, but I tell people I'm divorced so they won't think something is wrong with me. - Elayne Boosler

Marriage is the alliance of two people, one of whom never remembers birthdays and the other who never forgets them. - Ogden Nash

If the marriage needs help, the answer almost always is have more fun. Drop your list of grievances and go ride a roller coaster. - Garrison Keillor

A wedding anniversary is the celebration of love, trust, partnership, tolerance and tenacity. The order varies for any given year. - Paul Sweeney

Some people claim that marriage interferes with romance. There's no doubt about it. Anytime you have a romance, your wife is bound to interfere. - Groucho Marx