QuotaBillsIn wine, there is truth. - Pliny the Elder
Liquor Store: A stupor market - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
I work until beer o'clock. - Stephen King
I like a wine that fights back. - John Steed
Wine and children speak the truth. - Greek Proverb
When the wine is in, the wit is out. - English Proverb
Does wine count as a serving of fruit? - Joe-kster
I like my whiskey old and my women young. - Errol Flynn
Beer. Now there's a temporary solution. - Homer Simpson
Wine improves with age. I improve with wine. - Unknown
I'm Hybrid. I run on chocolate and wine. - Unknown
Wine is the flower in the buttonhole of life. - Werumeus Buning
Draft Dodger: Someone who avoids beer on tap. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Beer: The method of turning grain into urine. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor. - George Carlin
Talking to you is like casting pearls into wine. - Archie Bunker
As a cure for worrying, work is better than whiskey. - Ralph Waldo Emerson
Ah, beer, my one weakness. My Achilles heel, if you will. - Homer Simpson
Liquor talks mighty loud when it gets loose from the jug. - Joel C Harris
Some call it Cocktail Hour. To me, it's a support group. - Unknown
What two ideas are more inseparable than Beer and Britannia? - Sydney Smith
Herb is the healing of a nation, alcohol is the destruction. - Bob Marley
Stop trying to make everybody happy - you're not tequila. - Unknown
Ah, good ol' trustworthy beer. My love for you will never die. - Homer Simpson
We are all mortal until the first kiss and the second glass of wine. - Eduardo Galeano
I'll have a "Cafe Mocha Vodka Valium Latte" to go, please. - Unknown
A bottle of wine contains more philosophy than all the books in the world. - Louis Pasteur
In 1969 I gave up women and alcohol - it was the worst 20 minutes of my life. - George Best
You can lead a horse to water but I'd rather ride it to the liquor store. - Wayne Nowazek
In wine there is wisdom, in beer there is freedom, in water there is bacteria. - Ben Franklin
I imagine hell like this: Italian punctuality, German humour and English wine. - Peter Ustinov
Whiskey is by far the most popular of all remedies that won't cure a cold. - Jerry Vale
Logic, like whiskey, loses its beneficial effect when taken in too large quantities. - Lord Dunsany
Kidney: 1. Midpoint of a child's leg; 2. An organ used to convert beer into urine. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys. - P.J. O'Rourke
My heart says chocolate and wine but my jeans say, for the love of God women, eat a salad. - Unknown
I don't drink these days. I am allergic to alcohol and narcotics. I break out in handcuffs. - Robert Downey Jr.
Great people talk about ideas, average people talk about things, and small people talk about wine. - Fran Lebowitz
Age is just a number. It's totally irrelevant unless, of course, you happen to be a bottle of wine. - Joan Collins
I hate to advocate drugs, alcohol, violence, or insanity to anyone, but they've always worked for me. - Hunter S Thompson
If you have to choose between drinking wine every day or being skinny, which would you choose: Red or White? - Unknown
It was so quiet, a reservation kind of quiet, where you can hear somebody drinking whiskey on the rocks three miles away. - Sherman Alexie
A fruit is a vegetable with looks and money. Plus, if you let fruit rot, it turns into wine; something Brussels Sprouts never do. - P.J. O'Rourke
Not all chemicals are bad. Without hydrogen and oxygen, for example, there would be no way to make water, a vital ingredient in beer. - Dave Barry
Mancation: A man's vacation. Generally includes lots of beer, a Redneck grill, slabs of meat for cooking and a sack of fireworks. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
A woman should never be seen eating or drinking, unless it be lobster salad and Champagne, the only true feminine and becoming viands. - George G. Byron
Alcohol is not in my vodkabulary. However, I looked it up on whiskeypedia and learned if you drink too much of it, it's likely tequilya. - Unknown
When I have an idea, I turn down the flame, as if it were a little alcohol stove, as low as it will go. Then it explodes and that is my idea. - Ernest Hemingway
If you sang "99 Bottles of Beer on the Wall" and counted all the numbers mentioned throughout the entire song, it would add up to 14,850. - Joe-kster
The simple act of opening a bottle of wine has brought more happiness to the human race than all the collective governments in the history of earth. - Jim Harrison