#1 humor site on the 'net

Piano Fountain

Some pianists play watered-down music

Piano Fountain thanks to Idske Mulder, The Netherlands

Bubba made a better landscaper than a musician

The Water Music is a collection of orchestral movements, composed by George Frideric Handel. It premiered on 17 July 1717, in response to King George I's request for a concert on the River Thames.

QuotaBills
I like perfume and flowers. - Donatella Versace

The Earth laughs in flowers. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

I'm Liberace without a piano. - Paul Lynde

A flower blossoms for its own joy. - Oscar Wilde

Where flowers bloom, so does hope. - Lady Bird Johnson

Generosity is the flower of justice. - Nathaniel Hawthorne

The piano has been drinking, not me. - Tom Waits

Every flower must grow through dirt. - Unknown

A root is a flower that disdains fame. - Kahlil Gibran

The piano ain't got no wrong notes. - Thelonious Monk

An old man loved is winter with flowers. - Unknown

I enjoy playing the audience like a piano. - Alfred Hitchcock

A weed is no more than a flower in disguise. - James R Lowell

Life is a flower of which love is the honey. - Victor Hugo

Every flower is a soul blossoming in nature. - Gerard De Nuewal

Wine is the flower in the buttonhole of life. - Werumeus Buning

Upright Piano: The noblest musical instrument - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

An old man in love is like a flower in winter. - Portuguese Proverb

Our national flower is the concrete cloverleaf. - Lewis Mumford

Deep in their roots, all flowers keep the light. - Theodore Roethke

Get up from that piano. You hurtin' its feelings. - Jelly Roll Morton

Autumn is a second spring when every leaf is a flower. - Albert Camus

Hope is the only bee that makes honey without flowers. - Robert G Ingersoll

The fountain of youth is a mixture of gin and vermouth. - Cole Porter

Every day a piano doesn't fall on my head is good luck. - Meg Rosoff

Since the thing perhaps is to eat flowers and not to be afraid. - e e cummings

If I'm going to Hell, I'm going there playing the piano. - Jerry Lee Lewis

You can cut all the flowers but you cannot keep Spring from coming. - Pablo Neruda

Where man sees but withered leaves, God sees sweet flowers growing. - Albert Laighton

No one flower can every symbolize this nation. America is a bouquet. - William Safire

I don't really get romance. Bring me fish or moose, not flowers. - Eden Robinson

Having a baby is like trying to push a grand piano through a transom. - Alice Roosevelt Longworth

When a man brings his wife flowers for no reason, there's a reason. - Molly McGee

Life is like a piano. What you get out of it depends on how you play it. - Tom Lehrer

Grammar is a piano I play by ear. All I know about grammar is its power. - Joan Didion

And 'tis my faith, that every flower
Enjoys the air it breathes. - William Wordsworth

There are eighty-eight keys on a piano and within that, an entire universe. - James Rhodes

Sometimes I can only groan, and suffer, and pour out my despair at the piano. - Frederic Chopin

Always it's Spring,and everyone's in love and flowers pick themselves. - e e cummings

A wedding is just like a funeral except that you get to smell your own flowers. - Grace Hansen

The grass withers, the flower fades
But the word of our God stands forever. - Isaiah 40:8

Just living is not enough. One must have sunshine, freedom, and a little flower. - Hans Christian Andersen

The only amaranthine flower on earth is virtue; the only lasting treasure, truth. - William Cowper

There, standing at the piano, was the original good time who had been had by all. - Kenneth Tynan

Yoga is the fountain of youth. You're only as young as your spine is flexible. - Bob Harper

If we could see the miracle of a single flower clearly, our whole life would change. - Buddha

Forgiveness is the fragrance the flower leaves on the heel of the one who crushed it. - David Jeremiah

Stretching his hand up to reach the stars, too often man forgets the flowers at his feet. - Jeremy Bentham

When she started to play, Steinway came down personally and rubbed his name off the piano. - Bob Hope

I want flowers, I don't want to text. What does that make me? What kind of dinosaur am I? - Jennifer Garner

Look within. Within is the fountain of good, and it will ever bubble up if thou wilt ever dig. - Marcus Aurelius

Keep love in your heart. A life without it is like a sunless garden when the flowers are dead. - Oscar Wilde

If Springtime crawls out of the wild mouths of flowers, then surely, Winter crawls out of mine. - Cecilia Llompart

Give me a guitar, give me a piano, give me a broom and string, I wouldn't get bored anywhere. - Keith Richards

Although I am not stupid, the mathematical side of my brain is like dumb notes upon a damaged piano. - Margot Asquith

Love is a piano dropped from a fourth story window, and you were in the wrong place at the wrong time. - Ani DiFranco

I would have brung you flowers too, but I read in a magazine that they suck up all the carbon monoxygen. - Archie Bunker

You cannot endow even the best machine with initiative; the jolliest steamroller will not plant flowers. - Walter Lippmann

Humility before the flower at the timber line is the gate which gives access to the path up the open fell. - Dag Hammarskjold

Let us decide on the route that we wish to take to pass our life, and attempt to sow that route with flowers. - Du Chatelet

I think people need to be educated to the fact that marijuana is not a drug. Marijuana is a flower. God put it here. - Willie Nelson

You love flowers, but you cut them. You love animals, but you eat them. You tell me you love me, so now I'm scared. - Unknown

You write to become immortal, or because the piano happens to be open, or you've looked into a pair of beautiful eyes. - Robert Schumann

Piano playing is more difficult than statesmanship. It is harder to awake emotions in ivory keys than it is in human beings. - Ignace Jan Paderewski

Love is like a beautiful flower which I may not touch, but whose fragrance makes the garden a place of delight just the same. - Helen Keller

Nobody sees a flower, really - it is so small - we haven't time, and to see takes time, like to have a friend takes time. - Georgia O'Keefe

The typewriting machine, when played with expression, is no more annoying than the piano when played by a sister or near relation. - Oscar Wilde

The piano is a universal instrument. If you start there, learn your theory and how to read, you can go on to any other instrument. - Eddie Van Halen

If I were a flower,
humming bird would be my favourite bee
And If I were blind,
the light of darkness I'd love to see - Munia Khan

When I was nine, my father said 'You can take piano lessons or do karate' - I had a black belt and was competing before I was 19. - Elodie Yung


Microsoft Innovation

Complaint Jar

First Selfie

Leave My Drink Alone

2021 Hooters Owl and Birds of Prey Calendars

Great Scott!

Golden End of the Rainbow

Big Blade Snow Plow

Emergency Bridge Repair Team

A Fish Called Wanda - Uncut Version

Boat Launch

Redneck Motorcycle Transport

Denver Booted

Little Drinking Problem

Roller Coaster Skiing

Youth Walk

Horn Blower

Rembrandt's Anatomy Lessons

Aye Matey

Rice Litter Box

Middle Column?

Yoga in Palm Springs

Redneck Outhouse

This Cracks Me Up