#1 humor site on the 'net

No You Can't

When you can't produce what you promise

No You Can't thanks to Wayne Nowazek

Some signs don't pass safety standards

Business signs that tell a different story

QuotaBills
Safety doesn't happen by accident. - Unknown

You can't get too much winter in the winter. - Robert Frost

Don't talk unless you can improve the silence. - Jorge Luis Borges

Success means doing the best we can with what we have. - Zig Ziglar

You can't depend on anyone to be wrong all the time. - American Proverb

Do the best you can, and don't take life too serious. - Will Rogers

If you can't make it good, at least make it look good. - Bill Gates

If you can't feed a hundred people, then just feed one. - Mother Teresa

You can tell the nature of the man by the words he chooses. - Edwin L Cole

If you get a reputation as an early riser, you can sleep till noon. - Irish Proverb

You can get old pretty young if you don't take care of yourself. - Yogi Berra

If you look the right way, you can see that the whole world is a garden. - Frances H Burnett

Money can't buy you friends, but you can get a better class of enemy. - Spike Milligan

True audacity is the trick of knowing how far you can go in going too far. - Jean Cocteau

The only point in making money is, you can tell some big shot where to go. - Humphrey Bogart

We have bitten off more than we can chew, but we'll chew as fast as we can. - Ian Holloway

Wholesome: The only thing from which you can take the whole and still have some left - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

You've got to concentrate on one idea. You can't ride a horse with two asses. - Joe Segal

Prejudice is a great time saver. You can form opinions without having to get the facts. - E.B. White

I know it is wet and the sun is not sunny, but we can have lots of good fun that is funny. - Dr. Seuss

If you know enough about a subject, you can confuse anybody by selective use of the facts. - Ravi Zacharias

You can do what I cannot do. I can do what you cannot do. Together we can do great things. - Mother Teresa

Officialese: A government language where you can understand the words, but not the sentences - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

What's the good of being a genius if you can't use it as an excuse for being unemployed? - Gerald Barzan

You may not be able to change a situation, but with humor you can change your attitude about it. - Allen Klein

Let hope inspire you, but let not idealism blind you. Don't look back, you can never look back. - Don Henley

We all have possibilities we don't know about. We can do things we don't even dream we can do. - Dale Carnegie

The only way you can sustain a permanent change is to create a new way of thinking, acting, and being. - Jennifer Hudson

She's the sort of woman who lives for others - you can tell the others by their hunted expression. - C S Lewis

I've had the highest mountains. I've had the deepest rivers, you can have it all, but now, keep moving. - Imagine Dragons

Our prime purpose in this life is to help others. And if you can't help them, at least don't hurt them. - Dalai Lama

The only way we can ever teach a child to say "I'm sorry" is for him to hear it from our lips first. - Kevin Leman

I am afraid we must make the world honest before we can honestly say to our children that honesty is the best policy. - George Bernard Shaw

I have Dementia
My responses may be slow.
Take your time and wait for me,
It means more than you can know! - Unknown

Once you can accept the universe as matter expanding into nothing that is something, wearing stripes with plaid comes easy. - Albert Einstein

Often we can help each other most by leaving each other alone; at other times we need the hand-grasp and the word of cheer. - Elbert Hubbard

You can only learn from the second-raters. The first-raters are out of range; you can't see how they get their effects. - Unknown

Own only what you can always carry with you: know languages, know countries, know people. Let your memory be your travel bag. - Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn

You can close your eyes to things you don't want to see, but you can't close your heart to things you don't want to feel. - Renee Slanksy

Condemn none: if you can stretch out a helping hand, do so. If you cannot, fold your hands, bless your brothers, and let them go their own way. - Swami Vivekananda


1st Rolex

Tennis Plant

Florida Moves Out Of Hurricane Zone

Small Bills

Denmark Traffic Signals

Nail Polish Lookalilikes

Game Car

Overloaded Mailbox

Redneck Phone

Enjoy Fresh Air

Bread Board

Snaccident

Mini Bar

Frisbee Stopper

Redneck Sushi

Redneck's Lo-Tech Mobile Phone

Downchuck

Border Agent Alert

Cadillac Clearance

Leading By Example

Wired For Coffee

Cadillac Bike

Chip and Dip

Cat Couch Nap